conuly: (Default)
[personal profile] conuly
Here.

A Quest for a Restroom That's Neither Men's Room Nor Women's Room
By PATRICIA LEIGH BROWN

SAN FRANCISCO - Political epiphanies can occur in unexpected places. For Riki Dennis, a 35-year-old humanities student who is transsexual, it was the women's room at a rest stop on Highway 101 north of Santa Barbara.

"The boyfriend hit me, even in mellow California," said Ms. Dennis, who was in the early stages of becoming female when she was assaulted by a stranger after using the women's room. "I said, 'Sir, I have no designs on your girlfriend,' " she explained. "I just want to use the bathroom."

Ms. Dennis, whose lowish voice is now the lone betrayal of her birth sex, is a foot soldier on a new political frontier: the campaign to establish gender-neutral bathrooms in public places. The idea is to make sure that transgender people (an umbrella term that can include transsexuals, cross-dressers and those with a fluid, androgynous identity who do not consider themselves completely male or female) can use bathrooms without fear of harassment.

Ms. Dennis is one of 250 or so members of People in Search of Safe Restrooms, a group founded here three years ago. It reflects a small but active movement, mostly on college campuses but also in a few cities, in which the bathroom, that prosaic fixture of past battles against racial segregation and for the rights of the disabled, has become an emotional and at times deeply personal symbol of a cultural and political divide.

In fact, bathrooms have become a cultural "fault line," said Mary Anne Case, a law professor at the University of Chicago, where the Queer Action Campaign for Gender-Neutral Bathrooms recently got 10 single-use restrooms on campus designated gender neutral.

"Very few spaces in our society remain divided by sex," Professor Case said. "There's marriage and there's toilets, and very little else."

To young transgender people, especially college students, the issue has particular resonance.

"Students are looking hard at the right to express their gender, a painful right of passage for every young adult," said Riki Wilchins, executive director of the Gender Public Advocacy Coalition, a nonprofit group in Washington that fights discrimination and violence based on gender stereotypes. "These kids are demanding the right to be who they are and what they are 24/7. They're tired of being harassed or hassled when they simply need to use a public facility."

And so many students - including those at Beloit College in Wisconsin, Sarah Lawrence College in Bronxville, N.Y., and the University of California, Santa Barbara - have lobbied successfully for gender-neutral bathrooms.

At the New College of California, a liberal arts college in the Mission District of San Francisco, men's and women's rooms have recently given way to "de-gendered" restrooms, devoid of urinals as well as of white stick figures with pants or a skirt. Signs on the doors proclaim the new restroom politics: "Lots of people don't fit neatly into our culture's rigid two-gender system."

At the City College of San Francisco, a community college with more than 100,000 students, about 10 to 12 percent of the students are gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender. After complaints of harassment by a transgender student, campus administrators recently transformed some men's bathrooms into gender-neutral ones.

Two new satellite campuses, to open in 2007, are being planned with men's, women's and gender-neutral bathrooms on every floor of the buildings. Major new construction on the University of California, Santa Barbara, campus is also going to include gender-neutral bathrooms.

One reason the issue has significance on these campuses is that in contrast to previous generations, in which many sought to transform their birth sex through hormones or surgery, today's young transgender people are content with a more fluid identity.

"I use the male bathroom, because I live my life as a male," said Rolan Gregg, a 29-year-old student at the California College of Arts and Crafts in San Francisco, who was born female and, though he is taking hormones, does not "pass yet," as he put it. "The problem with not passing is that my risk of violence is really high. So going to the bathroom becomes really scary."

Public restroom use is governed by a legal patchwork of city and town ordinances and state laws. San Francisco is one of five cities, including New York, with regulations protecting public restroom access based on "gender identity," which refers to a person's internal sense of gender rather than their birth sex.

But in other places, restroom access based on gender identity is "an evolving area of the law," said Chris Daley, executive director of the Transgender Law Center, a San Francisco-based civil rights organization.

Here in California, where the governor, Arnold Schwarzenegger, speaks derogatorily of "girlie men," the battle over public municipal bathrooms began in San Francisco in 2001, when the city's Human Rights Commission surveyed use of the city's bathrooms after complaints by transgender people and others about harassment in public and private bathrooms. As a result of the survey, the city passed guidelines recommending gender-neutral bathrooms be an option in public places.

"In San Francisco," said Marcus Arana, the a discrimination investigator for the commission, "the choice between being hassled or holding their water affects thousands of people."

Elsewhere in the Bay Area, advocates of gender-neutral bathrooms are beginning to make themselves heard. In January, they pressed the board of supervisors of Alameda County to adopt a resolution forbidding discrimination in public facilities, including restrooms, based on gender identity. Alameda County was the home of Gwen Araujo, a 17-year-old transgender high school student who was murdered in 2002.

But at the meeting, opponents to the provision focused on potential side effects of the law.

"You can be sure that stalkers and peeping Toms will take full advantage of this change," said Catherine Norman, 54, a substitute teacher from Fremont. She added, "Bathrooms are about biology, not perceived gender."

Whenever he is in an airport, Shana Agid, a 30-year-old transgender art student, finds himself praying he can hold out until he gets on the airplane.

"Day after day, it gets a little old," he said of a ritual he confronts at least a half-dozen times a day. "It feels ridiculous to tell people as a grown person that you have trouble going to the bathroom."

Me, I don't care what the bathroom says. Male, Female, Women, Men, Carbon, Silicon... I just want more of them. There's never any public bathrooms in the city. Pain in the... well, you know.

Date: 2005-03-03 08:28 pm (UTC)
ursamajor: people on the beach watching the ocean (Default)
From: [personal profile] ursamajor
heh, exactly. as long as they're clean, who cares.

Date: 2005-03-03 08:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] elfster.livejournal.com
As someone who often uses both I have to say women's toilets are generally more pleasant but also more crowded damnit.

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] wodhaund.livejournal.com - Date: 2005-03-04 07:47 am (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] wodhaund.livejournal.com - Date: 2005-03-04 07:58 am (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] lots42.livejournal.com - Date: 2005-03-04 08:22 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2005-03-03 08:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ciara-belle.livejournal.com
You know, the day I went to visit Wesleyan College, it turned out to be Transgender Awareness Day (Week? possibly?) there. They declared that all bathrooms on campus were gender neutral, so the transgender students wouldn't feel uncomfortable.

I think that was the moment my mother decided that I wasn't going to Wesleyan.

Although me not getting in also probably had something to do with it.

Date: 2005-03-03 08:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ciara-belle.livejournal.com
Also, College should probably be University. *facepalm*

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] ursamajor - Date: 2005-03-03 08:38 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] ciara-belle.livejournal.com - Date: 2005-03-03 09:01 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] ursamajor - Date: 2005-03-03 09:07 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] ciara-belle.livejournal.com - Date: 2005-03-03 09:33 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2005-03-03 08:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fascinoma.livejournal.com
I don't mind there being more *neutral* toilets. However, I want there still to be women-only toilets.

I don't mind sharing a women's restroom with someone who was not always a woman.

I just don't want to be alone in a restroom with someone who identifies as a man.

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] fascinoma.livejournal.com - Date: 2005-03-03 08:48 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2005-03-03 08:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lakidaa.livejournal.com
I feel 12, as the group's acronym is PSSR. *giggles*

UM. anyway. I think that there should be more public restrooms in general, and a third one, for family/gender-neutral just because it makes sense.

Also: that Substitute teacher that said bathrooms are for biology, not precieved gender. those are kinda closely intertwined. just a little. If I get a Peeping Tom or something like that, I plan to implement the Boot to the Head defensive measure.

Also: I actualy like the Pay Toilet thing. all thr toilets (except for that one in Pisa, but Pisa sucks) were AWESOME. and cost less than a euro. for CLEAN! and TOILET PAPER! and niice. mmm, pay toilets. :3

Date: 2005-03-04 08:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lots42.livejournal.com
Of course, when you don't know it's a pay toilet and have to pee-pee dance all the way back across the store for cash, it's a bother

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] lakidaa.livejournal.com - Date: 2005-03-04 09:39 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2005-03-03 08:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] firingneurons.livejournal.com
Totally and completely not on the topic of the article but..
a painful right of passage for every young adult
Shoudln't that be 'rite of passage'? Or am I wrong/being picky?

On the subject, neutral bathroms wouldn't bother me any more than public bathrooms already do. So it's all fine by me!

Date: 2005-03-03 09:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ciara-belle.livejournal.com
No, you're right actually. Rite is correct.

Date: 2005-03-03 10:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] beetlebomb.livejournal.com
I've had experiences where the women's washroom was in such deplorable condition i went and used the men's room. The women's washroom at the Dufferin Mall has been an appalling disgrace several times. People leave shit on the toliet seats and splattered on the walls and dirty diapers and maxi pads are left all over the floor! It's enough to make me ashamed of my own gender.

I had to do the same thing at Dufferin Park once too because I had a choice of three stalls; 'A' was clogged to the brim, 'B' wouldn't close properly and 'C' was too narrow to be what I call "Tampon User Friendly".

In my opinion, as long as it's clean and has legroom I don't care whose it is if I can sneak in and use it when I need to!

Actually, this debate makes me think of the "Wait 'Til Your Father Gets Home" episode where Harry says something about washrooms with a "To WHom It May Concern" sign on the door!

Date: 2005-03-03 11:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] elfster.livejournal.com
I keep hearing about the disgusting abuse of women's toilets but have never encountered it myself. Maybe Kiwis are a cleaner breed :p.

Date: 2005-03-04 04:11 am (UTC)
deceptica: (Default)
From: [personal profile] deceptica
As far as I'm concerned toilets could just be unisex everywhere; I find separating them into men's and women's annoyingly inefficient.

I've lost count of the times when I needed to go pee at school/university or at the cinema before the start of the movie and had to stand in line for several minutes while the men's toilets were almost empty. In fact, if they are completely empty, a couple of women will usually sneak off anyway to go there and avoid standing in line, they just don't want to surprise a man in front of the urinal.

Really, toilets should be open to anyone who needs to use them, you shouldn't have to hold it back just because the free stall has the wrong stick figure on its door.

Date: 2005-03-04 08:32 am (UTC)
l33tminion: (Default)
From: [personal profile] l33tminion
I'm all for that, although I have an additional reason for that. For some reason, I've always had an irrational fear of accidentally walking into the wrong restroom and being embarrassed as a result.

Date: 2005-03-04 07:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wodhaund.livejournal.com
I remember the carbon, silicon guy. I thought that was pretty cool. (I'm a silicon kind of girl, myself. Diamonds never did as much for me as spun glass does. *grin*)

I don't care what's there, honestly, so long as it's clean. I've used men's toilets before because the women's were so disgusting.

Date: 2005-03-04 08:34 am (UTC)
l33tminion: (Default)
From: [personal profile] l33tminion
It's rather unfair. Women can get away with using the men's restroom if their restroom is unusable for some reason (what man would confront them about it?) but not the other way around. (That's been my perception of things, anyway...)

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] l33tminion - Date: 2005-03-04 08:44 am (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] l33tminion - Date: 2005-03-04 08:55 am (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] l33tminion - Date: 2005-03-04 12:46 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2005-03-04 08:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wodhaund.livejournal.com
It is rather unfair. A double standard, I think. Males can enter a women's restroom only if accompanied by a female, and only until a certain age. You wouldn't hear complaints of a 5-year-old boy being in the women's restroom, but if an 11-year-old boy went it, you'd never heard the end of it. That just seems silly to me. 5, 11, or 23, he's still got to pee, so let the poor sod pee!

Date: 2005-03-04 01:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wyldirishtric.livejournal.com
Hopped over from [livejournal.com profile] metaquotes.

I personally don't like having 5 year old boys in the ladies room. Too many times of mothers letting their 'precious child' piss all over the toilet seat, or run around and peer -under- the stall doors.
Preferably, I would rather have an 11 year old or 23 year old. They're less likely to be climbing all over things, or crawling into strangers' stalls.

Date: 2005-03-04 08:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] montrealais.livejournal.com
At a recent Transgender Alliance meeting, two members had friends who had been arrested for using the "wrong" washroom in Grand Central Station in New York City -- except in one case, it was the washroom corresponding to the person's assigned gender, and in the other case, it was the washroom corresponding to their gender of identification.

Can't win for losing, I guess.

Date: 2005-03-07 08:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] athanata.livejournal.com
i have no problem with unisex bathrooms. that's how it was in college, and no one had a problem with it. i think it's silly when there are the single rooms with a toilet and it has a 'male'/'female' sign on it - it's one room with one toilet! i'll use whatever is unlocked...

Date: 2005-03-03 08:28 pm (UTC)
ursamajor: people on the beach watching the ocean (Default)
From: [personal profile] ursamajor
heh, exactly. as long as they're clean, who cares.

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] elfster.livejournal.com - Date: 2005-03-03 08:35 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] wodhaund.livejournal.com - Date: 2005-03-04 07:47 am (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] wodhaund.livejournal.com - Date: 2005-03-04 07:58 am (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] lots42.livejournal.com - Date: 2005-03-04 08:22 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2005-03-03 08:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ciara-belle.livejournal.com
You know, the day I went to visit Wesleyan College, it turned out to be Transgender Awareness Day (Week? possibly?) there. They declared that all bathrooms on campus were gender neutral, so the transgender students wouldn't feel uncomfortable.

I think that was the moment my mother decided that I wasn't going to Wesleyan.

Although me not getting in also probably had something to do with it.

Date: 2005-03-03 08:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ciara-belle.livejournal.com
Also, College should probably be University. *facepalm*

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] ursamajor - Date: 2005-03-03 08:38 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] ciara-belle.livejournal.com - Date: 2005-03-03 09:01 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] ursamajor - Date: 2005-03-03 09:07 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] ciara-belle.livejournal.com - Date: 2005-03-03 09:33 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2005-03-03 08:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fascinoma.livejournal.com
I don't mind there being more *neutral* toilets. However, I want there still to be women-only toilets.

I don't mind sharing a women's restroom with someone who was not always a woman.

I just don't want to be alone in a restroom with someone who identifies as a man.

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] fascinoma.livejournal.com - Date: 2005-03-03 08:48 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2005-03-03 08:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lakidaa.livejournal.com
I feel 12, as the group's acronym is PSSR. *giggles*

UM. anyway. I think that there should be more public restrooms in general, and a third one, for family/gender-neutral just because it makes sense.

Also: that Substitute teacher that said bathrooms are for biology, not precieved gender. those are kinda closely intertwined. just a little. If I get a Peeping Tom or something like that, I plan to implement the Boot to the Head defensive measure.

Also: I actualy like the Pay Toilet thing. all thr toilets (except for that one in Pisa, but Pisa sucks) were AWESOME. and cost less than a euro. for CLEAN! and TOILET PAPER! and niice. mmm, pay toilets. :3

Date: 2005-03-04 08:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lots42.livejournal.com
Of course, when you don't know it's a pay toilet and have to pee-pee dance all the way back across the store for cash, it's a bother

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] lakidaa.livejournal.com - Date: 2005-03-04 09:39 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2005-03-03 08:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] firingneurons.livejournal.com
Totally and completely not on the topic of the article but..
a painful right of passage for every young adult
Shoudln't that be 'rite of passage'? Or am I wrong/being picky?

On the subject, neutral bathroms wouldn't bother me any more than public bathrooms already do. So it's all fine by me!

Date: 2005-03-03 09:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ciara-belle.livejournal.com
No, you're right actually. Rite is correct.

Date: 2005-03-03 10:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] beetlebomb.livejournal.com
I've had experiences where the women's washroom was in such deplorable condition i went and used the men's room. The women's washroom at the Dufferin Mall has been an appalling disgrace several times. People leave shit on the toliet seats and splattered on the walls and dirty diapers and maxi pads are left all over the floor! It's enough to make me ashamed of my own gender.

I had to do the same thing at Dufferin Park once too because I had a choice of three stalls; 'A' was clogged to the brim, 'B' wouldn't close properly and 'C' was too narrow to be what I call "Tampon User Friendly".

In my opinion, as long as it's clean and has legroom I don't care whose it is if I can sneak in and use it when I need to!

Actually, this debate makes me think of the "Wait 'Til Your Father Gets Home" episode where Harry says something about washrooms with a "To WHom It May Concern" sign on the door!

Date: 2005-03-03 11:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] elfster.livejournal.com
I keep hearing about the disgusting abuse of women's toilets but have never encountered it myself. Maybe Kiwis are a cleaner breed :p.

Date: 2005-03-04 04:11 am (UTC)
deceptica: (Default)
From: [personal profile] deceptica
As far as I'm concerned toilets could just be unisex everywhere; I find separating them into men's and women's annoyingly inefficient.

I've lost count of the times when I needed to go pee at school/university or at the cinema before the start of the movie and had to stand in line for several minutes while the men's toilets were almost empty. In fact, if they are completely empty, a couple of women will usually sneak off anyway to go there and avoid standing in line, they just don't want to surprise a man in front of the urinal.

Really, toilets should be open to anyone who needs to use them, you shouldn't have to hold it back just because the free stall has the wrong stick figure on its door.

Date: 2005-03-04 08:32 am (UTC)
l33tminion: (Default)
From: [personal profile] l33tminion
I'm all for that, although I have an additional reason for that. For some reason, I've always had an irrational fear of accidentally walking into the wrong restroom and being embarrassed as a result.

Date: 2005-03-04 07:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wodhaund.livejournal.com
I remember the carbon, silicon guy. I thought that was pretty cool. (I'm a silicon kind of girl, myself. Diamonds never did as much for me as spun glass does. *grin*)

I don't care what's there, honestly, so long as it's clean. I've used men's toilets before because the women's were so disgusting.

Date: 2005-03-04 08:34 am (UTC)
l33tminion: (Default)
From: [personal profile] l33tminion
It's rather unfair. Women can get away with using the men's restroom if their restroom is unusable for some reason (what man would confront them about it?) but not the other way around. (That's been my perception of things, anyway...)

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] l33tminion - Date: 2005-03-04 08:44 am (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] l33tminion - Date: 2005-03-04 08:55 am (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] l33tminion - Date: 2005-03-04 12:46 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2005-03-04 08:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wodhaund.livejournal.com
It is rather unfair. A double standard, I think. Males can enter a women's restroom only if accompanied by a female, and only until a certain age. You wouldn't hear complaints of a 5-year-old boy being in the women's restroom, but if an 11-year-old boy went it, you'd never heard the end of it. That just seems silly to me. 5, 11, or 23, he's still got to pee, so let the poor sod pee!

Date: 2005-03-04 01:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wyldirishtric.livejournal.com
Hopped over from [livejournal.com profile] metaquotes.

I personally don't like having 5 year old boys in the ladies room. Too many times of mothers letting their 'precious child' piss all over the toilet seat, or run around and peer -under- the stall doors.
Preferably, I would rather have an 11 year old or 23 year old. They're less likely to be climbing all over things, or crawling into strangers' stalls.

Date: 2005-03-04 08:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] montrealais.livejournal.com
At a recent Transgender Alliance meeting, two members had friends who had been arrested for using the "wrong" washroom in Grand Central Station in New York City -- except in one case, it was the washroom corresponding to the person's assigned gender, and in the other case, it was the washroom corresponding to their gender of identification.

Can't win for losing, I guess.

Date: 2005-03-07 08:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] athanata.livejournal.com
i have no problem with unisex bathrooms. that's how it was in college, and no one had a problem with it. i think it's silly when there are the single rooms with a toilet and it has a 'male'/'female' sign on it - it's one room with one toilet! i'll use whatever is unlocked...

Profile

conuly: (Default)
conuly

December 2025

S M T W T F S
  1 2 3 4 5 6
78 9 10 11 12 13
14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 222324 25 2627
28293031   

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Dec. 27th, 2025 09:09 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios