*bangs her head against the wall*

[conuly]

How do you get through to people?

Okay, let me try. Male parents are fathers. Female parents are mothers. IF you wish to claim that men have no maternal instincts, ever, but women do, please don't use the argument "they couldn't possibly have the same instincts, because men have paternal instincts, and no I can't explain how they're different, there's a whole letter different, you moron!"

That's just confusing.

And when you finally realize that you're being slow, please, the appropriate response is most emphatically NOT "how many kids did you say you had?"

That. Is. Not. Relevant.

Interestingly, this conversation would never have started if the OP hadn't broken a cardinal rule - never say "I don't mean to be prejudiced" or "No offense" or anything even remotely resembling a disclaimer before saying something prejudiced of offensive. If you feel you need to say the former in order to say the latter, don't say it. If you really must say it, please, you're less likely to seem prejudiced or offensive if you just leave the stupid disclaimer out.

Free advice. Take it.

And yes, I know, I'm IN bed, I'm going to sleep now.

Link posted at request of kinda original poster. Do me a favor, tell me when she started using the word "typical", would you?

Comments

[toastedtuna.livejournal.com]

I don't mean to be biased, but I hate it when people can't explain their arguments and find the weakest, most lame thing in the world to say, and expect people to accept it as their final answer.

Men can't have maternal instincts because they have paternal instincts? OK. I understand what the person is TRYING to convey. It's stupid, but I get it. It's very weak. There is no difference between paternal and maternal, except that one refers to men and one to women. That's it. That's the ONLY difference.

It's like maternal grandparents & paternal grandparents. One refers to the child's mother's side of the family, and the other refers to the child's father's side of the family.

Someone should bait your OP and see if paternal grandparents never have maternal feelings because they are paternal.

[conuly]

*gigglesnorts*

She's finally calmed down enough to give an example. ONE example. Her and her husband/partner.

Yeah. I already know that different people have different views on parenting, sweetie. Now, please, can you prove that your differences were caused by gender and not something else, say, upbringing?

And I love:

Oh, I can't possibly tell you what paternal instincts are because I'm not a father and can't say what men feel!

If that's the case, then how the hell do you think you know that they don't have the same exact damn "instincts" as mothers!

I dont' believe in parental instinct anyway. And when I do agree it might exist, I think it can be wrong - for example, if you're in a plane and it depressurises, your instinct is to put the mask on your kid first, but the smart thing to do is to put it on yourself first.