conuly

I'm just saying, for somebody super concerned with staying in the closet and preserving your reputation, you sure do kiss a lot of men. Maybe try talking to your wife about all this?

Him: I did, and now I disgust her!

Me: Yeah, but not because of the gay thing. She has gay friends. Also, she's still in love with somebody else. Which you know, so really, I think she's just annoyed that you lied to her and then tried to gaslight her about the lying. Maybe don't do that.

Him: Nah, I'll just spill my guts to this random dude I just met. And then we can make out!

Me: Oh, well, I'm sure this won't end badly at all.

(I have no idea if it will end badly or not, I haven't gotten that far. Maybe they all die of the flu sometime after the war, in which case their personal life choices will no longer matter.)