Summer session's almost over!

[conuly]

Time to celebrate... with bad jokes!

Post your worst jokes here. Bad puns, questionable taste, terrible punchlines... it's a bad joke day.

I'll start.

Dracula is walking down the street, when he gets attacked by a falling pile of sandwich meats, bread, and fruit. Finally, he's impaled on a toothpick. Before he dies, he screams

"OH NO! It's buffet, the vampire slayer!"

See what I mean? Really bad jokes.

I can do better worse.

Do you know why it's called Staten Island?
Because when Henry Hudson was sailing, and he saw it, he said

"Is dat an island?"

Okay. I'm done. For now.

Comments

[rainbow-goddess.livejournal.com]

Some people are drinking in an exclusive bar at the very top of a high-rise building. One man turns to the man next to him and says, "You know, when you're this high up, the air currents are so strong you can actually walk on them!" Man #2 says, "You're joking." Man #1 says, "I'll prove it." He walks out on the balcony, jumps off, and walks around in mid-air.

When he comes back in, he says, "See, I told you!" Man #2 goes out on the balcony, jumps off....and promptly falls to his death.

The bartender looks at Man #1, shakes his head and says, "Superman, you're a mean drunk."

[conuly]

Heard it, try again :)

Besides, it's not a bad joke. It's a good joke, lacking both puns and bad punchlines, not to mention questionable taste.

Knock knock?

[rainbow-goddess.livejournal.com]

Q. Why do elephants climb trees?
A. To get to their nests.

Q. Why is it dangerous to go into the jungle between 2:00 and 4:00 in the afternoon?
A. Because that's when elephants are jumping out of trees.

Q. Why are pygmies so short?
A. Because they went into the jungle between 2:00 and 4:00 in the afternoon.

[conuly]

*winces*

Okay. Those are bad.


Knock, knock!

[rainbow-goddess.livejournal.com]

Okay, who's there?

[conuly]

John.

[rainbow-goddess.livejournal.com]

John who?

[conuly]

*splashes your face with water*

JOHN THE BAPTIST!

*giggles*

I love that joke. I told it to Lizziey once and she promptly infected the group home up in White Plains.