I swear, once I get a job

(and we've dug ourselves out of this hole) I'm putting as much as I can every paycheck towards eye surgery. I don't even want eye surgery, it sounds scarier than dental work, but at 43 I think I have to accept reality: I am never going to learn to reliably put my glasses somewhere they won't break and I won't lose them.

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New Pope

What we know:

He's not as photogenic as the previous one, way more photogenic than the one before.

He's an American (from Chicago) with Peruvian citizenship after having lived there many years.

He chewed out JD Vance that one time for being completely and utterly wrong and heartless.

He's about as progressive as we can hope for from Catholic hierarchies - no dramatic rebound to traditionalism, anyway.

He wasn't the bookies' favorite choice, so if you bet on him you made serious cash.