LOL!

[conuly]

Worried about your pets after Rapture? Let these friendly atheists care for them when you're heavenbound!

Comments

[neurotica0.livejournal.com]

Awesome! Where do I sign up to care for a pet? ;)

[conuly]

Now, wait. This is a SERIOUS responsibility. In the unlikely event of Rapture, all your nonbelief will be called into question. Are you SURE you can take care of an animal while suffering AND trying to convert before Judgment Day?

[siderea]

I thought it was too late to convert after the Rapture? Wasn't that the point?

[conuly]

You think? But if you can't repent for your sins, why bother? Just kill us now and get it over with!

[siderea]

Nonono, you have to repent now. The Rapture is the deadline. Or so I understand. q.v. the parables of the wise and foolish virgins.

[conuly]

Well, that sucks. What a monumental waste of time. Surely it'd be easier for God to cut to the chase and just send all us unbelievers to Hell straightaway and skip the seven years...?

[siderea]

Yeah, this YHWH dude doesn't seem terribly well organized, honestly.

[conuly]

No, no, I get it.

It's like playing Sim City (old school, thanks) and sending out the tornado. The one that NEVER GOES AWAY.

[rainbow-goddess.livejournal.com]

According to a really bad movie I saw many years ago at church, the Rapture isn't the be-all and end-all. There's the Tribulation to go through first, when everyone gets the Mark of the Beast. Apparently some people will be able to repent before the final Judgment Day, which IS the be-all and end-all. But if you convert during the Tribulation, you'll probably be beheaded.

[neurotica0.livejournal.com]

I know I'll be "left behind," since I've committed the "unforgivable sin."

[conuly]

Suicide?!?

[neurotica0.livejournal.com]

Blasphemy against the Holy Spirit.

[conuly]

You're sure it ain't suicide?

[rainbow-goddess.livejournal.com]

No, it's "complete rejection of God," according to what I was told in Sunday School.

[feebeeglee.livejournal.com]

Yes, as a card-carrying Catlick I can attest to this.

It seems that atheists would be cool tho, cuz you can't exactly reject something if you deny it exists, amirite?

[feebeeglee.livejournal.com]

I mean that they're the same thing, the blasphemy and the rejection, by the way. I have a little person who is clingy and I can't think straight.

[rainbow-goddess.livejournal.com]

You could very well be right about that. If you don't believe something exists, then how can you reject it? Although I'm sure some will interpret "denying God's existence" as being the same thing as "rejecting God."

[gingembre.livejournal.com]

Yes but there is a clear difference (among those who care about such things) between being largely unaware/uneducated/savage people that know not of God, and being someone raised to be aware and learned in these things but Actively Rejecting it anyway. That's DELIBERATE, ilke the difference between manslaughter and premeditated murder, dontchya know.

[peaseblossom03.livejournal.com]

Why didn't I think of that?!

[rainbow-goddess.livejournal.com]

This is actually something I used to worry about many years ago. What would happen to my cat if I was Raptured? Part of it still nags in the back of my head from time to time.

[dragonlight7217.livejournal.com]

I just figured that the beliving animals would go while the atheist animals would stay behind... then they would have the opertunity to convert into good christian animals too.

Either way, I'm not overly concerned since my atheist fish and I will be home.

[conuly]

Maybe your fish aren't atheists. Maybe they're living their fishy lives hoping and praying that they can convert you.

[queenlyzard.livejournal.com]

Awesome. Where do I sign up as an Atheist Pet-Care Provider?