An open letter to... well... everybody.
Aug. 21st, 2008 10:25 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
conuly
But especially those members of "everybody" who might ever get in my way ever.
1. Okay. You're down here. You want to get up there. So you take the escalator. So far, so good. Now - recite the rule with me. Ready?
Walk on the left, stand on the right
I'll even accept "stand on the left with ample room to shove over if people need to get by", I do that all the time, probably because I'm left-handed myself, I don't know.
However, what is *not* cool? Standing on the left next to your buddy on the right and being totally deaf to everything short of a strong nudge in the back.
Some of us want to make the boat, you twit!
Walk - left. Stand - right. When in doubt, follow the crowd. If there's no crowd, I guess it doesn't matter.
2. Here's an interesting scenario. You're in the waiting room. ANY waiting room, but let's just call it the Staten Island Ferry Terminal.
Your group is all going to the same place at the same time. Let's just say that place is the Staten Island Ferry.
You probably all have cell phones, but that's beside the point.
If you and your group get separated once the doors open, you can just keep walking. You're all ending up in the same place anyway. Or, if you want to find your group first, you can step neatly to the side, out of the crowd, and hang out there. What you should *not* do is stop, all 200 of you, right in the middle of the doorway.
Why would you do that? Why? Would you do that in the middle of Main Street, Wherever? No? Well, don't do it here!
3. Okay, so we're all on the boat. And it's the dead of winter. (This didn't happen today, clearly, but I want to have it said.) And you, being a tourist, want to stand outside and take pictures.
Let me just say that I do not advise this. It is going to be cold out there, and very windy, and quite possibly wet as well. It is, in short, a foolish endeavor.
But you're a tourist, so yeah, whatever.
So you go to the doors, and you open the door...
And at this point you will win my heart if you do the one simple thing that every tourist seems to forget.
Close the door behind you.
And if I have to get up and pointedly close the door for you, because, as I said, it's cold and windy as fuck out there, do me a favor. Don't walk in and leave the door open again. And when I call after you "Hey, close the door, it's freezing", don't look around in bafflement. Just apologize and close it already. You may want to freeze. I don't. I like my toes.
Thanks very much.
Oh, and seriously? Don't do the Bronx Zoo and think you're going anywhere else that day. For some reason, everybody seems to think they can do this. Let me just say that the Bronx Zoo is really big and, being in the Bronx, is sure to be out of your way, wherever your way happens to be. Either don't go, or plan to get there early and leave there late. It's the only way to be happy, really.
1. Okay. You're down here. You want to get up there. So you take the escalator. So far, so good. Now - recite the rule with me. Ready?
Walk on the left, stand on the right
I'll even accept "stand on the left with ample room to shove over if people need to get by", I do that all the time, probably because I'm left-handed myself, I don't know.
However, what is *not* cool? Standing on the left next to your buddy on the right and being totally deaf to everything short of a strong nudge in the back.
Some of us want to make the boat, you twit!
Walk - left. Stand - right. When in doubt, follow the crowd. If there's no crowd, I guess it doesn't matter.
2. Here's an interesting scenario. You're in the waiting room. ANY waiting room, but let's just call it the Staten Island Ferry Terminal.
Your group is all going to the same place at the same time. Let's just say that place is the Staten Island Ferry.
You probably all have cell phones, but that's beside the point.
If you and your group get separated once the doors open, you can just keep walking. You're all ending up in the same place anyway. Or, if you want to find your group first, you can step neatly to the side, out of the crowd, and hang out there. What you should *not* do is stop, all 200 of you, right in the middle of the doorway.
Why would you do that? Why? Would you do that in the middle of Main Street, Wherever? No? Well, don't do it here!
3. Okay, so we're all on the boat. And it's the dead of winter. (This didn't happen today, clearly, but I want to have it said.) And you, being a tourist, want to stand outside and take pictures.
Let me just say that I do not advise this. It is going to be cold out there, and very windy, and quite possibly wet as well. It is, in short, a foolish endeavor.
But you're a tourist, so yeah, whatever.
So you go to the doors, and you open the door...
And at this point you will win my heart if you do the one simple thing that every tourist seems to forget.
Close the door behind you.
And if I have to get up and pointedly close the door for you, because, as I said, it's cold and windy as fuck out there, do me a favor. Don't walk in and leave the door open again. And when I call after you "Hey, close the door, it's freezing", don't look around in bafflement. Just apologize and close it already. You may want to freeze. I don't. I like my toes.
Thanks very much.
Oh, and seriously? Don't do the Bronx Zoo and think you're going anywhere else that day. For some reason, everybody seems to think they can do this. Let me just say that the Bronx Zoo is really big and, being in the Bronx, is sure to be out of your way, wherever your way happens to be. Either don't go, or plan to get there early and leave there late. It's the only way to be happy, really.
