So, lemme ask you a question...

[conuly]

Suppose you're 23. And you leave the house at 2 (I caught the 2:30 boat), telling your mother that you're heading to the bookstore. Now, every time you head to the bookstore, you spend several hours in there reading, only to duck out by purchasing one or two books. (And several hours reading means three to six books, depending on their length, just so we're clear on why purchasing only two books is 'ducking out'.)

Indeed, in your youth, you used to stay in the bookstore until it closed, and then go home with your mom.

Your phone is broken, by the way - and nobody actually knows anybody else's phone numbers, they just autodial.

So you go to the bookstore, and you read, and you come home a bit early - just missing the 8:30 boat, and catching the 9:30 instead. No calls to anybody because it's not like you *can* call anybody, right? This isn't news.

Is it reasonable for your mom to panic and call your sister at 8:43 9:23 asking frantically if you've been heard from?

I mean, I know I hardly ever stay out late, I've no need to, but... this seemed a bit over the top, y'know? I'm starting to wonder if I should've been more wild as a teenager - y'know, stayed out until midnight a few times, forgot to call when I got home, that sort of thing. Maybe my mom wouldn't worry so much now if I'd broken curfew once in a while....

(Actually, I don't believe I *had* a curfew, because "as long as you call and make sure I don't worry, it's okay with me", but that's not the point. Clearly, I'm paying for the mistakes of my not-so ill-spent youth.)

(All times are post meridiem by the way)

Comments

[wodhaund.livejournal.com]

I can't answer, because even though I don't live at home, my father calls me SEVERAL times a day to "check up on" me. In the fifteen minutes it took me today to drive from my apartment to their house to do laundry, he left me six (6) voicemails. ^^;

[ladyshrew.livejournal.com]

Well, my mom would do that, but she's hardly a measure for "reasonable."

[gingembre.livejournal.com]

It was NINE-TWENTY-THREE. Only slightly better, I know, but still...:-p

[conuly]

Oh wow. And on a school night, no less!

[darkpoole.livejournal.com]

I'd say it's reasonable if you (a) almost never stay out late and (b) almost always call if you're going to be delayed. If she's been conditioned by years of responsible punctuality on your part, then yeah... she's gonna start worrying when she doesn't hear from you.

Of course, I stayed out late pretty frequently (usually a late movie or something) and never bothered to call and let them know where I was, and even though my late-night disappearances were S.O.P., my mom worried about me all the freakin' time and would always call my dad to see if I was there. To a certain extent, I think that's just a "mom" thing.

[sayga.livejournal.com]

haha, my mom too. one night (when i was 39 or 40 weeks pregnant), my mom called and i was grumpy and didn't want to talk. so i turned my ringer off. the next day, i looked at my phone and saw my mother had called me every 10 minutes for 3 or 4 hours. i had 6 messages from her, and 1 from my sister, whom my mom had called frantically, asking if she'd heard from me. i understand she may have thought i'd gone into labor, but if i was in labor and didn't answer the first time, i wouldn't answer the 15th time either. i was completely annoyed (but very glad i'd turned off my ringer).

[conuly]

Oh, I hardly ever call anymore. Really, I'm so lax about the phone.

And when I go to the bookstore, I *do* stay out late - even back in my teenage days, I'd stay until they closed and get home with my mom around eleven or twelve.

[moggymania.livejournal.com]

Exactly the same answer went through my head. *grin*

"Well, my mother would have done that when I was in my early-mid twenties, but she's also the reason I'm a moderator of two forums for family members of people with a rather unpleasant personality disorder..."

(Not that any personality disorder is pleasant, mind you. Just that some are worse than others, and in this case, "that's like my mom" is almost like saying "yikes, get help!")

[conuly]

In *this* case, I (not having been subject to any frantic phone calls) was rather touched that she was so concerned.

And a bit annoyed because, seriously, I'm an adult. I can take care of myself on the mean streets of Staten Island and Lower Manhattan. I mean, dude.

But mostly touched.

[adina77.livejournal.com]

YOur an adult. you shouldn't have to have a curfew. Your mom was let know if your travels. So therefore she shouldnt of flipped out.

[ladyshrew.livejournal.com]

Ho boy!! I'd be glad to have turned off that ringer as well!!

[ladyshrew.livejournal.com]

LOL! Ohhhh yeah, sometimes I wonder about myself too... heh.

[wodhaund.livejournal.com]

I can't answer, because even though I don't live at home, my father calls me SEVERAL times a day to "check up on" me. In the fifteen minutes it took me today to drive from my apartment to their house to do laundry, he left me six (6) voicemails. ^^;

[ladyshrew.livejournal.com]

Well, my mom would do that, but she's hardly a measure for "reasonable."

[gingembre.livejournal.com]

It was NINE-TWENTY-THREE. Only slightly better, I know, but still...:-p

[conuly]

Oh wow. And on a school night, no less!

[darkpoole.livejournal.com]

I'd say it's reasonable if you (a) almost never stay out late and (b) almost always call if you're going to be delayed. If she's been conditioned by years of responsible punctuality on your part, then yeah... she's gonna start worrying when she doesn't hear from you.

Of course, I stayed out late pretty frequently (usually a late movie or something) and never bothered to call and let them know where I was, and even though my late-night disappearances were S.O.P., my mom worried about me all the freakin' time and would always call my dad to see if I was there. To a certain extent, I think that's just a "mom" thing.

[sayga.livejournal.com]

haha, my mom too. one night (when i was 39 or 40 weeks pregnant), my mom called and i was grumpy and didn't want to talk. so i turned my ringer off. the next day, i looked at my phone and saw my mother had called me every 10 minutes for 3 or 4 hours. i had 6 messages from her, and 1 from my sister, whom my mom had called frantically, asking if she'd heard from me. i understand she may have thought i'd gone into labor, but if i was in labor and didn't answer the first time, i wouldn't answer the 15th time either. i was completely annoyed (but very glad i'd turned off my ringer).

[conuly]

Oh, I hardly ever call anymore. Really, I'm so lax about the phone.

And when I go to the bookstore, I *do* stay out late - even back in my teenage days, I'd stay until they closed and get home with my mom around eleven or twelve.

[moggymania.livejournal.com]

Exactly the same answer went through my head. *grin*

"Well, my mother would have done that when I was in my early-mid twenties, but she's also the reason I'm a moderator of two forums for family members of people with a rather unpleasant personality disorder..."

(Not that any personality disorder is pleasant, mind you. Just that some are worse than others, and in this case, "that's like my mom" is almost like saying "yikes, get help!")

[conuly]

In *this* case, I (not having been subject to any frantic phone calls) was rather touched that she was so concerned.

And a bit annoyed because, seriously, I'm an adult. I can take care of myself on the mean streets of Staten Island and Lower Manhattan. I mean, dude.

But mostly touched.

[adina77.livejournal.com]

YOur an adult. you shouldn't have to have a curfew. Your mom was let know if your travels. So therefore she shouldnt of flipped out.

[ladyshrew.livejournal.com]

Ho boy!! I'd be glad to have turned off that ringer as well!!

[ladyshrew.livejournal.com]

LOL! Ohhhh yeah, sometimes I wonder about myself too... heh.