Hopefully the last letter of the school year.

[conuly]

They're improving. No italics, and even though their use of quotation marks is still odd and they are apparently conflicted about whether it is "the fifth grade" or "grade five" that will be graduating (not to mention whether that illustrious event occurs in the PS ## lunchroom or instead simply the lunchroom), it's pretty much readable.

Then I got to the personal note.

I want to thank all of you for another wonderful year! Working together we have made a huge difference in the lives of all our "dolphins". We have seen them grow both academically as well as socially as we prepare them to be the "future productive, law-abiding citizens of our society".

Is it just me, or does the high hopes that the students will be law-abiding sound like really, really faint praise? (Plus, is that even a goal? I want the nieces to act ethically and follow their consciences. In some circumstances, that may require breaking the law. Schools aren't big on civil disobedience, generally, but... really?)

Still, it's better than the note about Pennies for Patients, which informed us all that we were donating money to cure "leukemia". Their quotes, definitely their quotes. I'm far from the only one to routinely snark on these notes.

Comments

[janewilliams20]

Productive and law-abiding in quotes, too. So presumably they want them to only pretend to be productive and law-abiding, not to do it for real?

[marveen.livejournal.com]

I wish I had GIF skillz so I could do a montage of "Breakin' the Law" captions on top of someone buying a Big Gulp.

Productive and law-abiding. Yeah, setting the bar pretty low there, but look at who they hired to write this stuff.

[ksol1460.livejournal.com]

Our dad told us that some teacher at our elementary hellhole once told him, with a straight face, that the purpose of education was to "produce Happy Citizens."

.........

[conuly]

Well, at least there isn't something weird about wanting kids to grow up happy.