I hadn't seen this before, but was linked to it a few days ago

[conuly]

http://juststimming.wordpress.com/2011/10/05/quiet-hands/

I never had to deal with that from teachers nor, for the most part, family. The only thing similar is my mother's complaints that when I spun a mardi gras necklace on my arm, I made her dizzy - but even then, she didn't care so long as she didn't see me.

My mother's comment once, when I complained about the judgment inherent in saying autistic children don't "play properly" with toys but may "just" line them up was, before I could get to the point, a vehement interruption of "But that IS playing!" That's certainly how I played as a child much of the time.

Sometimes, I love my family very, very much.

Comments

[siderea]

Thanks for posting this.

[oloriel.livejournal.com]

This may come across as extremely ignorant, which is probably because it is, but I have to ask:
What does flapping mean? In this context? And why is it such a big deal when people need to do it? Is it somehow offensive to others who are not in the know?

I am obviously missing something. So could you explain it - if you don't mind?

Short answer:

[conuly]

Flapping is one way autistic individuals might stim. It's a very obvious, visible, clearly autistic way of stimming, which is probably why it gets attention.

Stimming looks a lot like what you'd call more often fidgeting - you might play with a pen, pace, rock back and forth, pull on your hair, pet something comforting, spin in an office chair....

When non-autistic people do similar things, it's often because they're bored or nervous, and this sort of behavior indicates how much they're not paying attention. When autistic people do this, it often means that we're trying to pay attention, but it's hard to focus so we're doing something so we can pay better attention. Or it might mean that things are overwhelming, and by tapping that pen is the difference between you handling what's going on and you completely not being able to deal. Or it might just be fun to do.

Some people have this idea that better functioning = acting less autistic. This is wrong, but if you're enmeshed in that concept, the goal is to make the kid act less autistic. If they act less autistic, then they ARE less autistic. (Except they aren't.)

Because autistic = bad to these people, that makes sense. Anything that creates the appearance of being normal is to be lauded.

Some stimming can be harmful to the person doing it or to others, and some (as mentioned in the comments) can be a legitimate distraction to others. In those specific instances, it makes sense to try to redirect it. However, that's not what's going on in her post that she described.

Re: Short answer:

[steorra (from livejournal.com)]

I've often wondered how the difference between stimming and fidgeting is delimited. Is it "it's stimming when autistic people do it, and fidgeting when non-autistic people do it"? Is it different kinds of actions? Is it that stimming has different purposes than fidgeting? Some not-entirely-coherent mix of different criteria?

(And how many different things are lumped together under the title "stimming"?)

Re: Short answer:

[conuly]

I've often wondered how the difference between stimming and fidgeting is delimited. Is it "it's stimming when autistic people do it, and fidgeting when non-autistic people do it"? Is it different kinds of actions? Is it that stimming has different purposes than fidgeting? Some not-entirely-coherent mix of different criteria?

Pretty much yes to everything suggested.

Interesting.

[marveen.livejournal.com]

The more I read about this, the more I think I'm just undiagnosed.

I can hold still if I really have to...for a few seconds. Otherwise, I'm always moving--tapping, fidgeting, rubbing fabric between my fingers, glancing around the room, and if I'm really up against the wall where I can't move or the tintype will be blurred, I rhythmically and methodically work my toes inside my shoes.

It almost hurts to hold still. If I force myself for more than a few seconds, it starts feeling like a panic attack--heart rate/respiration go up involuntarily, that kind of thing.

[ksol1460.livejournal.com]

*points to conuly's reply*

The word stimming was coined by Ivar Lovaas and it's short for self-stimulation. Which means exactly what it looks like it means.

More generally, anything that a child labeled autistic (or ADD/ADHD) does that makes other people uncomfortable is "stimming" and is a "behavior" that must be "extinguished".

ETA wrong icon.
ETA this.

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1310802/pdf/jaba00063-0004.pdf

[karalianne.livejournal.com]

I always had trouble with the idea of teaching kids to play, too, because my brothers and I played "normally" with toys but also made setups an awful lot. It was one of my favourite things to do. Take a bunch of toys and put them into a scene, and then just look at it from all angles. I have photos of some of them. Once I did it with my science homework (just the textbook and my notes).

"Quiet hands" is often used in regular preschools to get NT kids to keep their hands to themselves during circle time, but that's about the only time I've heard it used outside of a therapy setting. I think a few of the ABA programs I did early on in my career used the phrase, but I fell out of like with ABA after just a few years so I don't remember it very clearly. I do prefer, as one of the commenters mentioned, "gentle hands" for violent behaviours, as it makes more sense and is a phrase I use with children all the time (like when they're petting guinea pigs).

I also would never try to stop someone from stimming now, because I do it myself. It's hypocritical to force someone to stop doing something I myself am free to do at any time.