For the curious, here is Connie's Guide to Buying Gifts for Small Children You Don't Know.

[conuly]

(English capitalization rules for titles always mess me up, forgive me.)

Rule 1: Ask the parents what the kid would like. Seriously, any child over the age of 18 months has toy preferences, and probably has enough toys and books that you're at risk of bringing a double, and the parents might have rules about what they let their kid know exists. Just ask.

In fact, I'm going to put this one in bold.

ASK THE PARENTS.

Rule 2: If, for some reason, you don't want to ask the parents... CRAFT SUPPLIES.

Every kid can use some more craft supplies, and it doesn't matter if there are extras - it gets used up.

Now, here's my advice for craft supplies:

If you like the parents a lot, and they're artsy types, get unusual-er supplies. Yarn, ribbons, magazines and scissors to cut up, buttons - stuff the kids might actually not have 17 tons of at home already. And a pack of stickers. And maybe a book on craft activities you can do with kids.

If you like the parents well enough, get crayons and paper, smocks (you can never have enough smocks!), mats to lay down over tables to keep the tables clean, watercolor paints, and maybe some glue sticks. And a pack of stickers.

If you don't like the parents and resent buying stuff for their brats, get poster paints, no smocks, markers, glitter, glue, and LOTS AND LOTS of stickers.

Rule 3: Skip the wrapping paper. It's a pain to undo, and it just makes a mess, so, unless you hate the parents, go with a gift bag. Kids love bags anyway, especially when they're little.

Rule 4: Also, get a card. Very little kids like the novelty of cards.

Comments

[sporks5000.livejournal.com]

hmmm...

I take this to mean that someone's done something to earn your wrath?

[conuly]

Three times this week, the same question: WHAT DO I GET A TWO YEAR OLD???

Well, two year olds have opinions, thoughts, and feelings too. You wouldn't ask "WHAT DO I GET A 50 YEAR OLD????", would you?

[velvetchamber.livejournal.com]

I actually think that is a very good and valid question. Perhaps not if the fifty year old is someone you know well, but if one is invited to the fiftieth birthday of a schoolmate you haven't seen except of festive occasions since you were 25, it's a perfectly good question.

[conuly]

Then you ought to ask the 50-year-old's friends, though, shouldn't you? Or the 50-year-old himself.

[velvetchamber.livejournal.com]

Possibly, but then again, you can always decide to go for something no-one suggested and hope it'll be of some good. My mother went to the 60th birthday celebration of a classmate, and she, and her very good friend and classmate, gave him a tree and some books on growing trees in Iceland. Perhaps it'll be nice, perhaps it's a very silly gift.

[conuly]

That's not something I'd suggest for any random 60-year-old, though, so I think my point still stands.

It's just... I put a lot of effort into buying gifts for people. I think about it, I do some research, and I try to get a gift they'll really appreciate. I put more effort for younger kids, because I want to get something they can grow with, not something they'll be done with in a few months. (Unless it's clothes, because what can you do there?)

So, like, for Deniz for Christmas she got a lot of stuff for "make-your-own" princess gear - a mirror, a skirt, wings, a wand, lots of stuff, all that she could decorate herself. For Ana's friend Jackie, she got three DK books on dancing because she's taking a ballet class (and for her birthday this year she's getting lefty scissors and a book on cutting and some collage stuffs like magazines and whatnot). For Ana's friend Meghan, her last birthday, because she likes bugs, I got her a few books on bugs and some stickers, and I carefully added accent stickers to the books. Su for her birthday last week got a book about a boy's button collection and a few bags of buttons and some stickers. (I'm serious about stickers, they're always a hit!)

And my reward for all this effort, and I do try hard to match presents to people, is that last year one person gave Ana a Dora puzzle with a few too many pieces, a box that wasn't easy to close, and it was all easily chewed up by the baby anyway. Some thought would have been appreciated, y'know?

My *other* reward is that I get to hear for the next few months how much so-and-so "still loves the gift!!!!!", and Deniz goes "That was just what I wanted and didn't tell anybody!!! How did you know????", and I know that I got something just right.

And, frankly, it kinda irritates me to think of people assuming all kids will be happy with the same stuff based on arbitrary categories such as age and sex. I understand one doesn't usually put the same amount of effort into buying gifts for people they don't know, I don't either (hence the nifty guide - while I was more than a little irritated, it *is* good advice!), the attitude of "Well, I can just name the age (or the sex, or where they live, or the color of their eyes) and get good ideas!" really irks me. Don't ask a random stranger, ask people who know the person and might at least be able to tell you that he's already got three copies of "Green Eggs and Ham" and the book is too long for him anyway.

[sporks5000.livejournal.com]

good point.

[conuly]

Kids that age are all different from one another, is all.

[gingembre.livejournal.com]

Excellent guide. You did forget to mention that if you hate loathe and detest the parent, you can buy drums and other very noisy things :-p. Bonus points if it has a crazy light up spinning action.

[conuly]

You can come over to the party with a lot of batteries and a screwdriver, and offer to replace all the dead batteries :)

[brownkitty.livejournal.com]

I'd like to add colored pipe cleaners to your list. I could just about leave Colin on a desert island and he would be fine with enough pipe cleaners. (He might actually build an airplane that flies out of them, and get back home.)

[sporks5000.livejournal.com]

hmmm...

I take this to mean that someone's done something to earn your wrath?

[conuly]

Three times this week, the same question: WHAT DO I GET A TWO YEAR OLD???

Well, two year olds have opinions, thoughts, and feelings too. You wouldn't ask "WHAT DO I GET A 50 YEAR OLD????", would you?

[velvetchamber.livejournal.com]

I actually think that is a very good and valid question. Perhaps not if the fifty year old is someone you know well, but if one is invited to the fiftieth birthday of a schoolmate you haven't seen except of festive occasions since you were 25, it's a perfectly good question.

[conuly]

Then you ought to ask the 50-year-old's friends, though, shouldn't you? Or the 50-year-old himself.

[velvetchamber.livejournal.com]

Possibly, but then again, you can always decide to go for something no-one suggested and hope it'll be of some good. My mother went to the 60th birthday celebration of a classmate, and she, and her very good friend and classmate, gave him a tree and some books on growing trees in Iceland. Perhaps it'll be nice, perhaps it's a very silly gift.

[conuly]

That's not something I'd suggest for any random 60-year-old, though, so I think my point still stands.

It's just... I put a lot of effort into buying gifts for people. I think about it, I do some research, and I try to get a gift they'll really appreciate. I put more effort for younger kids, because I want to get something they can grow with, not something they'll be done with in a few months. (Unless it's clothes, because what can you do there?)

So, like, for Deniz for Christmas she got a lot of stuff for "make-your-own" princess gear - a mirror, a skirt, wings, a wand, lots of stuff, all that she could decorate herself. For Ana's friend Jackie, she got three DK books on dancing because she's taking a ballet class (and for her birthday this year she's getting lefty scissors and a book on cutting and some collage stuffs like magazines and whatnot). For Ana's friend Meghan, her last birthday, because she likes bugs, I got her a few books on bugs and some stickers, and I carefully added accent stickers to the books. Su for her birthday last week got a book about a boy's button collection and a few bags of buttons and some stickers. (I'm serious about stickers, they're always a hit!)

And my reward for all this effort, and I do try hard to match presents to people, is that last year one person gave Ana a Dora puzzle with a few too many pieces, a box that wasn't easy to close, and it was all easily chewed up by the baby anyway. Some thought would have been appreciated, y'know?

My *other* reward is that I get to hear for the next few months how much so-and-so "still loves the gift!!!!!", and Deniz goes "That was just what I wanted and didn't tell anybody!!! How did you know????", and I know that I got something just right.

And, frankly, it kinda irritates me to think of people assuming all kids will be happy with the same stuff based on arbitrary categories such as age and sex. I understand one doesn't usually put the same amount of effort into buying gifts for people they don't know, I don't either (hence the nifty guide - while I was more than a little irritated, it *is* good advice!), the attitude of "Well, I can just name the age (or the sex, or where they live, or the color of their eyes) and get good ideas!" really irks me. Don't ask a random stranger, ask people who know the person and might at least be able to tell you that he's already got three copies of "Green Eggs and Ham" and the book is too long for him anyway.

[sporks5000.livejournal.com]

good point.

[conuly]

Kids that age are all different from one another, is all.

[gingembre.livejournal.com]

Excellent guide. You did forget to mention that if you hate loathe and detest the parent, you can buy drums and other very noisy things :-p. Bonus points if it has a crazy light up spinning action.

[conuly]

You can come over to the party with a lot of batteries and a screwdriver, and offer to replace all the dead batteries :)

[brownkitty.livejournal.com]

I'd like to add colored pipe cleaners to your list. I could just about leave Colin on a desert island and he would be fine with enough pipe cleaners. (He might actually build an airplane that flies out of them, and get back home.)