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conuly
I mean, I do know why, it's because of the baby, but it's stupid. Life is easier once we're all outside. MUCH easier.
Cute Ana anecdote of the day: So, my mom got her a locker mirror to put on the fridge so that Ana could look in the mirror without being hoisted up (and just today we learned that now Ana can see herself in the bathroom mirror by standing on the toilet, all by herself). The other day, Ana and I are cuddling in the kitchen right after her mom left. Suddenly, she goes "OH NO!" and picks herself up to turn the mirror - it had been vertical instead of horizontal. This kinda sucked, because she turned it crookedly, so now it was irritating *me* instead of her. Not to fear - as soon as she sat down again, she sees the problem, goes "OH NO!" and goes and fixes it :) I'd feel bad about this, warping her little mind and all, but I haven't straightened *anything* around her. Ever. So it's Not My Fault (or problem)!
Today was great, we got out the door in plenty of time, made it to the museum early. I'm not sure how tomorrow will work, going to the BCM for their science thing, but it shouldn't be too bad if I wake the baby earlier than I did today. I hope....
So, we go to the museum, and play around in the art program (and Ana did absolutely no art, save a tinyshort stint at the play-dough. I did remind her, but she decided she wanted to play with the toys instead. Fair enough, it's cleaner than paint, anyway), and as Ana's playing with the toys, a little boy is getting in her way slightly. I've met his mom before, but only briefly.
Now, to clarify my position on all this: I want Ana to take care of her own problems as much as possible. So if she wants to sit on the toilet (I wish), I want her to do as much of it as she can all by herself. And if some little kid pushes her or takes her toy, I want her to stand up for herself *before* coming for help. At the same time, I want her to know that I'll step in with whatever it is (getting her on the toilet, getting a kid to behave) if she needs the help. It's a delicate balance, but so far, the plan is working - she'll do a lot of things herself (and if slighted by a kid, she's starting to tell *them* not to push or whatever instead of coming to *me* and repeating the phrase) but if she thinks she needs help, she tells me "I need help" (and gets it).
However, this does mean I notice people who step in earlier than I would - most of the time, I figure if all the kids look happy, nobody's crying or being overly mean, they're good. I don't need to worry. So if people step in with Ana, I do try to point out that she can defend herself against other toddlers without at all implying that they're wrong. Because they're probably not, they're just approaching the matter from a different angle.
So when this kid's mom tells him to say excuse me, I point out in an I-hope-not-confrontational-way that Ana can tell him not to push if she thinks he's in her way. I mean, I remind Ana to say please and thank you myself, so it's the same thing, but....
Oh, nevermind. The details are unimportant.
Point is, mom = on the spectrum, kid = diagnosed, passed her my journal address because I never check my email, and would like links to relevant autistic-related sites (she's new to this she says) if she shows up (unlike the person I met at the zoo, who could've benefited from them....), because I never know if my links are the best. Nice person. Not curebie. I could give her a big ol' hug, except I don't really know her. And I had a baby on my chest who might've objected....
Cute Ana anecdote of the day: So, my mom got her a locker mirror to put on the fridge so that Ana could look in the mirror without being hoisted up (and just today we learned that now Ana can see herself in the bathroom mirror by standing on the toilet, all by herself). The other day, Ana and I are cuddling in the kitchen right after her mom left. Suddenly, she goes "OH NO!" and picks herself up to turn the mirror - it had been vertical instead of horizontal. This kinda sucked, because she turned it crookedly, so now it was irritating *me* instead of her. Not to fear - as soon as she sat down again, she sees the problem, goes "OH NO!" and goes and fixes it :) I'd feel bad about this, warping her little mind and all, but I haven't straightened *anything* around her. Ever. So it's Not My Fault (or problem)!
Today was great, we got out the door in plenty of time, made it to the museum early. I'm not sure how tomorrow will work, going to the BCM for their science thing, but it shouldn't be too bad if I wake the baby earlier than I did today. I hope....
So, we go to the museum, and play around in the art program (and Ana did absolutely no art, save a tinyshort stint at the play-dough. I did remind her, but she decided she wanted to play with the toys instead. Fair enough, it's cleaner than paint, anyway), and as Ana's playing with the toys, a little boy is getting in her way slightly. I've met his mom before, but only briefly.
Now, to clarify my position on all this: I want Ana to take care of her own problems as much as possible. So if she wants to sit on the toilet (I wish), I want her to do as much of it as she can all by herself. And if some little kid pushes her or takes her toy, I want her to stand up for herself *before* coming for help. At the same time, I want her to know that I'll step in with whatever it is (getting her on the toilet, getting a kid to behave) if she needs the help. It's a delicate balance, but so far, the plan is working - she'll do a lot of things herself (and if slighted by a kid, she's starting to tell *them* not to push or whatever instead of coming to *me* and repeating the phrase) but if she thinks she needs help, she tells me "I need help" (and gets it).
However, this does mean I notice people who step in earlier than I would - most of the time, I figure if all the kids look happy, nobody's crying or being overly mean, they're good. I don't need to worry. So if people step in with Ana, I do try to point out that she can defend herself against other toddlers without at all implying that they're wrong. Because they're probably not, they're just approaching the matter from a different angle.
So when this kid's mom tells him to say excuse me, I point out in an I-hope-not-confrontational-way that Ana can tell him not to push if she thinks he's in her way. I mean, I remind Ana to say please and thank you myself, so it's the same thing, but....
Oh, nevermind. The details are unimportant.
Point is, mom = on the spectrum, kid = diagnosed, passed her my journal address because I never check my email, and would like links to relevant autistic-related sites (she's new to this she says) if she shows up (unlike the person I met at the zoo, who could've benefited from them....), because I never know if my links are the best. Nice person. Not curebie. I could give her a big ol' hug, except I don't really know her. And I had a baby on my chest who might've objected....
Mom=on the spectrum
Date: 2006-01-25 12:18 am (UTC)My name is Carol. I'm the Mom from the Staten Island Children's Museum. As Connie said I'd love any and all links that will help give my son tools to function in the neurotypical world (Read: Tell NTs to stay out of his face and quit bugging him) while he cheerfully grows up embracing his geekhood.
Right now, my husband and I are trying to find someone who will oversee the homebased program we are setting up for him at our home in Bayridge, Brooklyn. Anyone know anyone? I probably don't have to say this, but naturally a BSG fan would be preferable.
PS. Connie, I coulda hugged you too.
Re: Mom=on the spectrum
Date: 2006-01-25 12:31 am (UTC)Battlestar Galactica fan?
*thinks*
Maketh sense, though I hated the last episode.
*goes to google*
Yeah, that's the only thing BSG seems to stand for.
Re: Mom=on the spectrum
Date: 2006-01-25 12:48 am (UTC)Re: Mom=on the spectrum
Date: 2006-01-25 01:11 am (UTC)And I thought things were bad when I overdosed on B5 this summer! I spent weeks convinced that the government was evil and xenophobic and taking away our civil... um... Oh, nevermind.
Re: Mom=on the spectrum
Date: 2006-01-25 12:35 am (UTC)Re: Mom=on the spectrum
Date: 2006-01-25 07:53 am (UTC)I'm the ASD Mum of three boys, all of different neurologies.
Get an LJ and join in the fun! That way, if someone has befriended you, you can read their friends only posts. Also, you can join cool groups like asperger & spectrum_parent.
It'll cost ya nothing.
Naiiad
Re: Mom=on the spectrum
Date: 2006-01-25 07:57 am (UTC)Mom=on the spectrum
Date: 2006-01-25 12:18 am (UTC)My name is Carol. I'm the Mom from the Staten Island Children's Museum. As Connie said I'd love any and all links that will help give my son tools to function in the neurotypical world (Read: Tell NTs to stay out of his face and quit bugging him) while he cheerfully grows up embracing his geekhood.
Right now, my husband and I are trying to find someone who will oversee the homebased program we are setting up for him at our home in Bayridge, Brooklyn. Anyone know anyone? I probably don't have to say this, but naturally a BSG fan would be preferable.
PS. Connie, I coulda hugged you too.
Re: Mom=on the spectrum
Date: 2006-01-25 12:31 am (UTC)Battlestar Galactica fan?
*thinks*
Maketh sense, though I hated the last episode.
*goes to google*
Yeah, that's the only thing BSG seems to stand for.
Re: Mom=on the spectrum
Date: 2006-01-25 12:48 am (UTC)Re: Mom=on the spectrum
Date: 2006-01-25 01:11 am (UTC)And I thought things were bad when I overdosed on B5 this summer! I spent weeks convinced that the government was evil and xenophobic and taking away our civil... um... Oh, nevermind.
Re: Mom=on the spectrum
Date: 2006-01-25 12:35 am (UTC)Re: Mom=on the spectrum
Date: 2006-01-25 07:53 am (UTC)I'm the ASD Mum of three boys, all of different neurologies.
Get an LJ and join in the fun! That way, if someone has befriended you, you can read their friends only posts. Also, you can join cool groups like asperger & spectrum_parent.
It'll cost ya nothing.
Naiiad
Re: Mom=on the spectrum
Date: 2006-01-25 07:57 am (UTC)