Today is my father's birthday.

[conuly]

And Ana had a doctor's appointment. I was supposed to go with Jenn, but I didn't realize how early it was - I was not happy. And then I flipped out and tore the house apart looking for some papers. Honestly, I was sobbing. It's now 11 hours later, and I still feel on the brink of tears, even though I found the papers hours ago. I just miss Jenn on the boat, and go on several wild goose chases - first to the wrong subway stop, then the wrong entrance, then the wrong floor, and I think I never was in the right building. I only calmed down while walking a mile and a half to my mom's office. Passed by a bookstore with a wonderful collection of DWJs and a nice collection of board books, bath books, and stuffed animals - must go back. And I passed by a store with a great collection of wooden toys, again, must go back. Got a book for Ana to make up for not helping at the doctor's, will bring it by on Friday when I babysit.

No idea why I got so upset, though. *sighs*

Comments

[interactiveleaf.livejournal.com]

Random episodes happen to everybody. You'll be sitting quietly in a chair, reading a book, playign a video game and eating leftover pizza, and suddenly the world is overwhelming and you're sobbing like the first time you read what happened to Old Yeller. . .

. . . Or maybe that's just me.

[conuly]

Never read that book. Never wanted to.

This was... I don't know. It happens, time and again, but I haven't found the cause yet.

[interactiveleaf.livejournal.com]

Eh, you didn't miss much. The dog saves everyone's life then goes rabid and has to be shot in the end. When you're four, it's a major disaster. When you're thirty, it's a fact of life. Think Bambi.

The other, I really do think, happens to most people at different degrees of intensity. Some folks are better at controlling their moments of panic (or overwhelmedness, or whatchamaycallit) than others.

Lord knows M. and I both have those moments. We respond to them differently and (so far) don't have them at the same time.

BTW, I've quit doing support. I'm not getting support requests e-mailed to me with any kind of regularity, and while I can check my e-mail frequently, the web format isn't convenient at all. I don't know why I thought you'd care, but I'm telling you anyway.

So now you can respond to this, and I won't respond to that response, and then you can have an even number of responses, and your day will be a little bit better.

Hey, that's all I can DO from here, OK? If I could do more, I would.

[conuly]

Email...?

I've always used the web page, it's just easier for me. I can never check my email.

But certainly you shouldn't do it if you don't wanna. *hugs*

And I do know how the story ends. I also know that Beth dies, though I never read Little Women.

[gingembre.livejournal.com]

It does happen to everyone sometimes. (And I *really* appreciate that you ried to find me anyway! :-D)

However, I think you should give some serious consideration to keeping a food & mood journal, for lack of a better term. I would suggest a paper copy, at least *in addition to* any internet/computer version you may do because you want to make sure you don't miss inputting something you nibbled on. I would also track your sleeping schedule with that, even what lotions/shampoos/deodorant you're using, whether you have your period, etc. In fact, at some point charting your cycle (think "natural" family planning methods) might be good too since it might give you some additional insight into your hormone shifts. I *still* think both the casein&gluten-free diet, & the Feingold "diet" could also be very beneficial to you.

I REALLY think that somewhere in the correlations between diet, exercise, sleep, food & cosmetic additives, stress at school & home, hormone cycles and maybe even total internet/TV time (eye strain) there will be some patterns which will be traceable and thus possible to control. It probably won't get rid of every mood swing or panic attack, but it COULD help limit them a great deal. I wouldn't suggest trying to start tracking everything all at once, or changing everything suddenly, of course. You'd overload your brain :-p.

Let me know if you ever think it's worth a try.

[tsukikage85.livejournal.com]

I'm sure Jenn will forgive you, and the book can't hurt. ^_^
I'm sorry about your wild goose chase... :O

[interactiveleaf.livejournal.com]

Random episodes happen to everybody. You'll be sitting quietly in a chair, reading a book, playign a video game and eating leftover pizza, and suddenly the world is overwhelming and you're sobbing like the first time you read what happened to Old Yeller. . .

. . . Or maybe that's just me.

[conuly]

Never read that book. Never wanted to.

This was... I don't know. It happens, time and again, but I haven't found the cause yet.

[interactiveleaf.livejournal.com]

Eh, you didn't miss much. The dog saves everyone's life then goes rabid and has to be shot in the end. When you're four, it's a major disaster. When you're thirty, it's a fact of life. Think Bambi.

The other, I really do think, happens to most people at different degrees of intensity. Some folks are better at controlling their moments of panic (or overwhelmedness, or whatchamaycallit) than others.

Lord knows M. and I both have those moments. We respond to them differently and (so far) don't have them at the same time.

BTW, I've quit doing support. I'm not getting support requests e-mailed to me with any kind of regularity, and while I can check my e-mail frequently, the web format isn't convenient at all. I don't know why I thought you'd care, but I'm telling you anyway.

So now you can respond to this, and I won't respond to that response, and then you can have an even number of responses, and your day will be a little bit better.

Hey, that's all I can DO from here, OK? If I could do more, I would.

[conuly]

Email...?

I've always used the web page, it's just easier for me. I can never check my email.

But certainly you shouldn't do it if you don't wanna. *hugs*

And I do know how the story ends. I also know that Beth dies, though I never read Little Women.

[gingembre.livejournal.com]

It does happen to everyone sometimes. (And I *really* appreciate that you ried to find me anyway! :-D)

However, I think you should give some serious consideration to keeping a food & mood journal, for lack of a better term. I would suggest a paper copy, at least *in addition to* any internet/computer version you may do because you want to make sure you don't miss inputting something you nibbled on. I would also track your sleeping schedule with that, even what lotions/shampoos/deodorant you're using, whether you have your period, etc. In fact, at some point charting your cycle (think "natural" family planning methods) might be good too since it might give you some additional insight into your hormone shifts. I *still* think both the casein&gluten-free diet, & the Feingold "diet" could also be very beneficial to you.

I REALLY think that somewhere in the correlations between diet, exercise, sleep, food & cosmetic additives, stress at school & home, hormone cycles and maybe even total internet/TV time (eye strain) there will be some patterns which will be traceable and thus possible to control. It probably won't get rid of every mood swing or panic attack, but it COULD help limit them a great deal. I wouldn't suggest trying to start tracking everything all at once, or changing everything suddenly, of course. You'd overload your brain :-p.

Let me know if you ever think it's worth a try.

[tsukikage85.livejournal.com]

I'm sure Jenn will forgive you, and the book can't hurt. ^_^
I'm sorry about your wild goose chase... :O