Some people might want to be warned, is the word "triggering"?

[conuly]

First part of the story

Second part of the story

Frankly, the whole story is disgusting me, and I don't have any brainwashing in my past.

Comments

[spitefairy.livejournal.com]

I've read about Tranquility Bay before, it's some pretty sick stuff. Christ.

[conuly]

And it's not alone, either, that's the worst part of it. *sighs*

[spitefairy.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I know. There are about five of them in Utah that I know of and a couple in Idaho. Strangely, I learned about this from Seventeen or some magazine like that.

[rachelkachel]

Ugh. I can't imagine how any parent would really think that's good for a kid. It surprises me that it's actually legal.

There were a couple cases here in Utah a while ago, where kids died in some wilderness program intended to do the same thing...

[deathchibi.livejournal.com]

Yeah, dad always threatened me with this sorta stuff, but I'm kinda glad for the half-assed parenting that involves spending as little money on me as possible.

[stejcruetekie.livejournal.com]

Mozingo has four sons, an insurance company, and is a good example of a typical Tranquility parent. Divorced from Josh's mother, busy, wealthy...

Messy divorce and remarriage are the norm among these parents.


I think I see the real problem right here...

*sighs*

[marveen.livejournal.com]

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

I did some unbalanced things when I was a teenager myself, and I found the same answers being handed out as the anorexic girl. ('No one else is thinking about you, why do you think anyone notices you?') I never did drugs, but I self-mutilated and did the suicide-attempt thing.

The true irony is that both my teachers in high school and the peers of the anorexic girl are so close to the truth that it's painful to think about. The real freedom from the agonizing self-consciousness that leads to paranoia is to realize that yes, someone might be looking at you and disliking what they see, but so what? What does it matter what they think or say or do?

I learned to sheathe my soul in ice.

Yes, there is some damned heavy-handed brainwashing going on there. And it's incredible to me that any American court anywhere would support this kind of thing.

But on the other side of the coin, there is the wealthy Lindsay Cohen. She's almost nineteen, and thus as a legal adult could leave if she really wanted to. But that would mean giving up her moneyed lifestyle. (She states this in so many words. She's not afraid of losing her parents' love, only their financial support.)

As someone who moved out of my parents' house as soon as I had a job that would pay rent, I have very little sympathy for Ms. Cohen. She is literally giving up her liberty for security.

[conuly]

The first I heard of this sort of thing I was still in Brooklyn, so under 10. I was reading one of Jenn's teenish magazines (no idea why she had that...). It was a very complimentary article, which instilled in me a very longlasting fear of authority.

No, wait. My dad instilled in me a longlasting fear of authority. Dear god, I still remember that fight with the crossing guard because "he didn't want somebody telling him when he could cross the street".

Re: *sighs*

[conuly]

But on the other side of the coin, there is the wealthy Lindsay Cohen. She's almost nineteen, and thus as a legal adult could leave if she really wanted to. But that would mean giving up her moneyed lifestyle. (She states this in so many words. She's not afraid of losing her parents' love, only their financial support.)

Maybe she can't afford to live on her own. You were lucky, you had a job. She doesn't, and if ALL she has is her parent's money, she's right to fear living on the streets. It's not an easy life, and after a few years in that place I might distrust my ability to support myself as well - it's a classic abusive pattern. You wear somebody down to the point that they're more scared of being alone than being with you.

[zarriq.livejournal.com]

It's not exactly legal in the U.S. or the U.K. That's why they put Tranquility Bay in Jamaica.

[conuly]

What, that they divorce? I think the problem is that they have high expectations for their kids, very likely don't spend enough time with the kids, and would rather pay to get their problems dealt with than to actually work to solve the problems. Oh, and that they think abusive situations are a Good Thing OR simply can't be bothered to check out the real thing.

Re: *sighs*

[marveen.livejournal.com]

Mind you, we don't have the whole story, but what she actually said sounded like her parents were just withdrawing their financing of her college education, not kicking her out from under their roof.

[zarriq.livejournal.com]

Oh man. I've heard about that place before. Once, a girl committed suicide by jumping off the roof. Towels were used to clean up after the stain she left behind, towels that were not even washed before they were given back to the inmates. One kid ended up with blood and hair on his. Lovely.

There's some great information at this page (http://www.intrepidnetreporters.com/TeenHelp/teenhelp.html). Be sure to check out a mother's experience (http://www.intrepidnetreporters.com/TeenHelp/breaking.htm), in which a woman who enrolled her daughter into Tranquility Bay writes about why she did it and how the people who run those programs get parents to go along with them. It seems the directors of those programs brainwash and intimidate the parents about as much as they do the kids. It's really long, but a really good read that gives a lot of new perspective on the whole thing.

Re: *sighs*

[conuly]

That's not what I read. I'm pretty sure it said her parents would pay for her education if she graduated, but wouldn't take her back home if she didn't.

Re: *sighs*

[marveen.livejournal.com]

She picks the words of her explanation carefully. 'OK. I'm used to a high-profile lifestyle. I really don't own anything too inexpensive. What I'm accustomed to isn't anything of the sort you can buy for $50. And my parents promised to support me through law school if I stayed. So really, walking isn't worth it. Sometimes,' she murmurs, 'I still think I didn't need to come here...' but stops herself and offers, vaguely, 'But I guess in life things happen.'

It all comes down to your reading of the word "support" in the passage.

(In the three sentences previous to that one, she talks about money, money and money. I interpreted the fourth sentence as being about money as well, since she never mentions any worry about losing her parents or not seeing them again or anything like that.)

[stejcruetekie.livejournal.com]

I would say a very large part of the problem is bad parenting - of which divorce is a large part of that.

That, and just plain stupidity.

[push-the-limits.livejournal.com]

Where in Idaho?

I live in Boise...

[malantha.livejournal.com]

'If I have kids, and they start giving me a problem, well they are going straight in the programme. If I had to, I'd pull the trigger without hesitation.'

i thought that was one of the most disturbing quotes in the article, especially his choice of words in the 2nd sentence. *shudder*

and by the way, "triggering" is the word if you're referring to the anorexic girl. but triggering also occurs with other things like self-mutilation so you may want to be more specific

Re: *sighs*

[conuly]

She talks about having only $50 - which really is a valid concern.

[conuly]

I don't think divorce = bad parenting. In fact, if you're in a bad relationship (I'm not even talking abusive, just bad with yelling and fighting), divorce is almost certainly better than having the kid always hearing the anger and screaming.

[conuly]

and by the way, "triggering" is the word if you're referring to the anorexic girl. but triggering also occurs with other things like self-mutilation so you may want to be more specific

Here I was under the view that "triggering" meant anything that might induce a flashback of some sort. I could be more specific, but then I'd have a huge-ass title. So if you think there's any risk at all, don't click or ask for details first.

[neurotica0.livejournal.com]

I confused as to how divorce implies bad parenting?

[neurotica0.livejournal.com]

I agree.

(Also, my computer must be very slow, as your comment was not there when I clicked to make my own reply.)

[unico-love.livejournal.com]

That's just... highly disturbing.

[staircase-wit.livejournal.com]

Cool thing it, it makes Scientology seem not-so-bad. I mean, I'm not going to pledge a million years with Sea Org, but as a person who's studdied how cults function, this seems to be very textbook.