I didn't babysit last friday...

[conuly]

I was going to, but 'dul wussed out on his dentist's appointment and Jenn overslept, so I was there when they had their massive blowout. Y'see, Ana's been teething. Teething makes her clingy. And when left alone in a room, she's more prone to cry than usual. But when Jenn went to pick her up, 'dul said "no, just get dressed, she'll settle down". So she did. And Ana was still crying. So 'dul put her in her crib. And she's still crying. And now the fight starts: should Jenn pick her up, or should they let her cry it out (now that she's almost a year old)?

Jenn and 'dul both love Ana very much, they're both good parents, and this is the same child we're talking about, not two children with very different temperments, and they couldn't agree on a very important parenting decision.

Parents do not know what's best for their children.

Lemme repeat this. Parents do not know what's best for their children. They make mistakes, like everyone else. They may understand their children better than anyone else, but then, they might not if they aren't very close. Some parents are like that, they don't get involved.

Thinking logically, nobody would ever say that doctors always know what's best for their patients... if that were the case, we wouldn't ever get second opinions. And nobody ever claims that people don't make mistakes, even people with important jobs like "firefighter" or "teacher". But parents, some parents use the line "I know what's best for my children" like it's true. And it might be, for this parent, this child, but generally, it isn't. Parents make mistakes.

I'm still thinking of the Michelle Dawson controversy. She presented a criticism of the ABA industry, and parents are flipping out that "she said I don't love my kids" because... what? She said you may have made a mistake? A very well educated mistake, but a mistake nonetheless? It happens. Live, learn, and get over it.

Comments

[oloriel.livejournal.com]

Lemme repeat this. Parents do not know what's best for their children. They make mistakes, like everyone else. They may understand their children better than anyone else, but then, they might not if they aren't very close. Some parents are like that, they don't get involved.

Too true.

And I wish people would learn that saying they made a mistake once doesn't mean saying they messed up everything...

[conuly]

Oh yeah, that's a big one too. Look, okay, so maybe you didn't feed your kid right. Pity, but you sure were good with toilet training, and they're really close to you now. People can't be perfect.

[oloriel.livejournal.com]

Lemme repeat this. Parents do not know what's best for their children. They make mistakes, like everyone else. They may understand their children better than anyone else, but then, they might not if they aren't very close. Some parents are like that, they don't get involved.

Too true.

And I wish people would learn that saying they made a mistake once doesn't mean saying they messed up everything...

[conuly]

Oh yeah, that's a big one too. Look, okay, so maybe you didn't feed your kid right. Pity, but you sure were good with toilet training, and they're really close to you now. People can't be perfect.