This is the worst thing I've read in a while.

[conuly]

Warning - this is a horrific story of child neglect. Read at your own risk, and respect the bold lettering

A follow-up is here

What gets me, beside the fact that the abusive mother clearly feels that she wasn't doing anything wrong and is the injured party (yeah, right), is her claim that her child, even as an infant, was "spoiled".

"Danielle, she says, was born in a hospital in Las Vegas, a healthy baby who weighed 7 pounds, 6 ounces. Her Apgar score measuring her health was a 9, nearly perfect.

"'She screamed a lot,' Michelle says. 'I just thought she was spoiled.'"

You know, I see the comment on LJ a lot - "is my baby spoiled? I want to do such-and-fuch (usually involving cuddling or feeding an infant more often/on demand), but won't that spoil her? If my newborn isn't sleeping on a schedule, will that spoil him for life?" and I keep saying the mantra - you can't spoil a baby. Children act out because they don't get *enough* attention. Babies under a certain age can't be manipulative - and what you're describing is communication - and thankfully, I never in my life have had reason to believe anybody I'm talking to is seriously going to go to this horrifying level. I still don't. The worst parents I know aren't anywhere near this bad.

But I don't know. Comments about babies - infants, newborns even - and their potential for spoilage are so common, so normal even, that now that I see the amazing terrifying conclusion - I can't help but think that it had to start *somewhere* normal.

So, you know, in the morning I'm going to wake up, and I'm going to go upstairs, and I'll boil the oatmeal, and I'll poke my sister until she wakes up, and I'll hug Ana, and I'll hug Evangeline, and I don't know what we're doing but I know two little girls who spend their days being hugged and tickled and cuddled and kissed and (mostly) spoken to nicely by their family. I'm even still upset about Tuesday, but we've been spending their grounding with a lot of attention. (And, you know, you limit their toys to one at a time and take some away - and I do believe they've had the most fun, creative play they've had in *months*. Which just goes to show that there is such a thing as toy overload. Of course, I'm always going "Wow, cool thing, I so want to play with that the nieces must have that! BUY!" and not being sensible. I tell you, it's a good thing Haba is so expensive or their kitchen would be stocked and then some...!)

Comments

[amarafox.livejournal.com]

That poor girl :(

Such terrible neglect.

[ncp.livejournal.com]

AMY!??!?!? From RASSM?!?!? How the heck are ya? (I was on there in the mid 90s, after the SEs. Indian chick. I don't give out my real name online anymore, but jamesg77 will vouch for me!)

(Connie, sorry for hijacking your LJ.)

I read the story on Rimrunner's LJ, and my heart just about broke. I had to stop so I could cuddle my baby.

[amarafox.livejournal.com]

:D

One and the same. I am doing fine here. :)

[mayna.livejournal.com]

That article (it was on the front page of the Dispatch this past weekend) really hit my heart hard.

[leora.livejournal.com]

Personally, I think there is a difference between wild chldren and severe abuse. If a child is actually raised by an animal, then the child gets touch and care, while not getting language. Genie and Dani both lacked touch and care as well. Genie was also beaten whenever she made noise, so it's not surprising that she didn't develop language. That combined with having been found so old. :/

Dani really has a very decent potential outlook for language acquisition, especially given what they've already stated. The younger the better, obviously, and pre-puberty is really important. She's following a lot of the patterns of recovery that are known from other cases. Children denied touch (and food, alas, in this case) will often grow very quickly when they start being cared for well, and she seems to be fitting that pattern. That is very good.

I'd completely expect her to be able to acquire some words - children with no language found older than her have. However, the real question is can she acquire grammar and a fluency to express what she wants to. Given that she seems to understand what is said to her at a very high level, she could well end up talking and communicating, especially if she ends up with a late puberty.

We discussed numerous cases of abused and lost children in various psych classes, certainly in Language and Thought, possibly in child development or abnormal psych, I forget... But I don't think her potential outcome is that poor. Especially given how much she's learned so fast. I am really glad they found her so young. It's still a horrible waste of potential to treat a child like that and a horrible thing to put anyone through.

I feel a bit sorry for her because of the publicity. I think it's quite possible there will come a time when she understands how the world viewed her, at least somewhat. And she will be studied and mentioned in future psych classes, and I'm not sure how she will feel about that. Although, on the other hand, if she does well maybe it will encourage better care and teaching of other children found in similar circumstances. I think parents would be more willing to adopt and give good care if they know the child has a great deal of potential.

It's really hard to say what her potential is, both because of the lack of enough data on such cases (for which I am quite glad; we don't need more children treated like this) and because individuals vary. But I am glad they are trying to help her get as much out of life as she can now.

The story does mention that the mother's IQ is somewhat low. I think this is more an argument for better supervision of children, more involvement and follow-up (and I do think CPS did a poor job here of not investigating enough or following up enough). I think after the first investigation it wouldn't have been wrong to insist that the mother take some parenting courses. They want the Texas polygamists to take parenting courses and they are feeding their children and cleaning their clothes and such.

[amarafox.livejournal.com]

That poor girl :(

Such terrible neglect.

[(Anonymous)]

AMY!??!?!? From RASSM?!?!? How the heck are ya? (I was on there in the mid 90s, after the SEs. Indian chick. I don't give out my real name online anymore, but jamesg77 will vouch for me!)

(Connie, sorry for hijacking your LJ.)

I read the story on Rimrunner's LJ, and my heart just about broke. I had to stop so I could cuddle my baby.

[amarafox.livejournal.com]

:D

One and the same. I am doing fine here. :)

[mayna.livejournal.com]

That article (it was on the front page of the Dispatch this past weekend) really hit my heart hard.

[leora.livejournal.com]

Personally, I think there is a difference between wild chldren and severe abuse. If a child is actually raised by an animal, then the child gets touch and care, while not getting language. Genie and Dani both lacked touch and care as well. Genie was also beaten whenever she made noise, so it's not surprising that she didn't develop language. That combined with having been found so old. :/

Dani really has a very decent potential outlook for language acquisition, especially given what they've already stated. The younger the better, obviously, and pre-puberty is really important. She's following a lot of the patterns of recovery that are known from other cases. Children denied touch (and food, alas, in this case) will often grow very quickly when they start being cared for well, and she seems to be fitting that pattern. That is very good.

I'd completely expect her to be able to acquire some words - children with no language found older than her have. However, the real question is can she acquire grammar and a fluency to express what she wants to. Given that she seems to understand what is said to her at a very high level, she could well end up talking and communicating, especially if she ends up with a late puberty.

We discussed numerous cases of abused and lost children in various psych classes, certainly in Language and Thought, possibly in child development or abnormal psych, I forget... But I don't think her potential outcome is that poor. Especially given how much she's learned so fast. I am really glad they found her so young. It's still a horrible waste of potential to treat a child like that and a horrible thing to put anyone through.

I feel a bit sorry for her because of the publicity. I think it's quite possible there will come a time when she understands how the world viewed her, at least somewhat. And she will be studied and mentioned in future psych classes, and I'm not sure how she will feel about that. Although, on the other hand, if she does well maybe it will encourage better care and teaching of other children found in similar circumstances. I think parents would be more willing to adopt and give good care if they know the child has a great deal of potential.

It's really hard to say what her potential is, both because of the lack of enough data on such cases (for which I am quite glad; we don't need more children treated like this) and because individuals vary. But I am glad they are trying to help her get as much out of life as she can now.

The story does mention that the mother's IQ is somewhat low. I think this is more an argument for better supervision of children, more involvement and follow-up (and I do think CPS did a poor job here of not investigating enough or following up enough). I think after the first investigation it wouldn't have been wrong to insist that the mother take some parenting courses. They want the Texas polygamists to take parenting courses and they are feeding their children and cleaning their clothes and such.