![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
conuly
We're out and about. Ana is talking to another child or to another adult, and I call her to say "no, you can't have a cookie" or "hey, do you need to use the toilet?" or "stop asking random people for food, they don't know you" or "can you come here a second? I need a hug?" or whatever and she doesn't respond immediately. She didn't hear me, or it didn't register, fine. I can call a second time.
Random adult (the one she's talking to, or the one with the child she's talking to, generally) will tell her, helpfully "Your mommy is calling - you should answer her" and Ana will reply that no, her mommy's at work.
Now, at this point there are any number of possible replies. You could say "Well, go over there anyway" or "Answer her anyway" or "Who's that, then?" or "Oh, okay. Well, somebody's calling you, at any rate" or "Oh. Can you answer your babysitter, then?" or, oh, I don't know, any number of things.
What they invariably seem to think is the correct response is, instead "No, she's not, she's right there! There's your mommy!"
So instead of helping Ana get her act together and answer me, they're instead engaging her in a pointless argument. And it's a silly one, anyway - what, do they think she doesn't know who her own mother is? She's three! And a half! Years!
People, you need to listen to the child. She knows of what she speaks.
(And to make things worse, this happens at toddler programs at the SICM, where I know for a positive fact that a good 33% or more of the regulars (and any number of the random kids) don't show up there, regularly, with their moms. They arrive with their grandparents, or aunts, or babysitters, and a surprising number of the regulars show up with their dads - moms are in the majority, but not by all that much. Really, people need to *think* sometimes!)
(And, as a side note, when you find out that I'm not her mom, but do watch her during the week - yes, it's nice of me, but I'm not a *saint*. I'm not that wonderful. Just shut up already, will you? This isn't anything special, it's just another job people do. What am I going to do, force Jenn to quit work? How's she going to pay the bills then, and they're family! I always make a point, during this stage of the conversation, to mention that I get paid. I neglect to mention how *much* I get paid, of course....)
Random adult (the one she's talking to, or the one with the child she's talking to, generally) will tell her, helpfully "Your mommy is calling - you should answer her" and Ana will reply that no, her mommy's at work.
Now, at this point there are any number of possible replies. You could say "Well, go over there anyway" or "Answer her anyway" or "Who's that, then?" or "Oh, okay. Well, somebody's calling you, at any rate" or "Oh. Can you answer your babysitter, then?" or, oh, I don't know, any number of things.
What they invariably seem to think is the correct response is, instead "No, she's not, she's right there! There's your mommy!"
So instead of helping Ana get her act together and answer me, they're instead engaging her in a pointless argument. And it's a silly one, anyway - what, do they think she doesn't know who her own mother is? She's three! And a half! Years!
People, you need to listen to the child. She knows of what she speaks.
(And to make things worse, this happens at toddler programs at the SICM, where I know for a positive fact that a good 33% or more of the regulars (and any number of the random kids) don't show up there, regularly, with their moms. They arrive with their grandparents, or aunts, or babysitters, and a surprising number of the regulars show up with their dads - moms are in the majority, but not by all that much. Really, people need to *think* sometimes!)
(And, as a side note, when you find out that I'm not her mom, but do watch her during the week - yes, it's nice of me, but I'm not a *saint*. I'm not that wonderful. Just shut up already, will you? This isn't anything special, it's just another job people do. What am I going to do, force Jenn to quit work? How's she going to pay the bills then, and they're family! I always make a point, during this stage of the conversation, to mention that I get paid. I neglect to mention how *much* I get paid, of course....)
no subject
Date: 2006-11-09 04:33 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-11-09 09:12 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-11-10 03:42 am (UTC)