Back in BotW, Sorelia and Tye were wandering around the woods looking for Silent Princess

[conuly]

and often getting attacked by Bokoblins in the process. I always felt like they'd just go home if you could give them some Silent Princess, but that was never an option in the game. Very frustrating, and why do those two needs to pick flowers to prove their love in the first place? (I'd say "let alone an endangered species", but let's be real, I harvested the shit out of that flower. Which is a bit silly, because I never made any stealth foods!)

In TotK, there are several displaced Lurelinites. After you kill all the pirate bokos infesting their town, you can go back and tell every one of them to go home. This isn't a quest, exactly, it's just something you can do. Sorelia is hanging around Lakeside Stable waiting for her husband so they can go home - but where the hell even is he!? I can't find Tye anywhere, and I've looked!

Google is useless. Either everybody else can find him, or nobody else cares.

Speaking of the pirate bokos, people in the game frequently talk about monsters as if they're people - in BotW a gang of bokoblins was referred to as "bullies", and these are "pirates", and so on. They sail - and presumably build? - ships and make camps, and they sit around the fires telling jokes to each other, and lizalfos make metal tools....

It really annoys me that the Blood Moon text says that they have aimless lives, because of course they were just created by Ganon. This game is sorely in need of some fix-it fics to... well, fix it. They do not have aimless lives. They just don't communicate well with the species we like to talk to. And, okay, they were created by Ganon, but honestly, that's not their fault.

Comments

[8hyenas]

He's at Riverside stable by the well

[conuly]

Thank you!

Here, take a silent princess from me!

[8hyenas]

I fear... you will remain frustrated

[conuly]

These people are the worst. They are the absolute fucking worst. They deserve each other. Let them be miserable. No silent princess for them!

[conuly]

Wait, can I not tell him to go home to his wife!?

WTF.

[movingfinger]

The NPC side problem that gets me is Pondo. Pondo is plodding back and forth between comfortless quondam Rito Stable and Snowfield Stable, and if you talk to him he is fixated on the idea of a house full of monsters. His own house is destroyed by fire, there's a fing robot camp on a rock on his bowling alley, and I want a quest to get Pondo home to his antlered gateposts and pins.

[conuly]

You and me both, buddy.