I have a question...

[conuly]

Though it'll sound maudlin and self-pitying, it's really not. No, really.

Why are people I know online different from the people I know in real life?

Most people I know online either like me, don't like me BUT don't mindlessly attack me, or don't like me and are universally recognized as being stupid. Or they're indifferent.

In real life, people fall more into the categories of: love me, kinda like me, tolerate me, mindlessly attack me for no apparent reason. And the indifferents. The last group, in real life, is generally seen by the large number of indifferent people as either being funny or not being wrong enough to stop, but online, they're seen as being stupid and worth yelling at. And of course, people wonder why I prefer you guys :)

So, seriously. Why is there a difference? Do you think you'd be friendly with me (however friendly you are) if you'd met me in real life first? For those of you who know me in both situations (I think there's THREE), am I different?

Comments

[fjorab-teke.livejournal.com]

I think I'd be friendly with you in real life, although we might bore each other a little bit after a while since we don't have a whole lot of interests in common...but hen again we might introduce each other to more new things, which is one reason I'm sometimes drawn to people who have only one or two things in common with me, so we can share more and learn from each other.

[xiggaroo.livejournal.com]

I don't know why there's a difference. I have ideas, but nothing really conclusive.

I don't know if I'd've been friendly with you IRL at the time i met you online. You know I am fairly shy now, but when we first met, I blushed and panicked if someone looked at me. I'm not as bad anymore (which, really, I thank you mainly for. But that's unrelated.)

I think you're the same person online and off. You're you. But, you do seem to get frustrated more easily IRL. Which, I think applies to everyone.

I'm not really sure what you're asking... I'm tired.

*hugs* I love you to death Con, and that goes for so many people. Isn't that what matters?

[xiggaroo.livejournal.com]

And, can I add that you're the only person I'd want to have a 3 am conversation about declawing cats with. :P

[codeman38.livejournal.com]

::shrug:: Personally, from what I've seen of your journal, I actually think you're rather interesting. In a good way. And you'd probably be the sort with whom I'd be friends in real life as well...

[conuly]

There's a bad way to be interesting?

[xiggaroo.livejournal.com]

Man whips out penis and pisses off the side of the boat.

Interesting? Yes.

[conuly]

Not especially... it happens often enough, anyway.

Besides, it's a great place to make snide comments!

[xiggaroo.livejournal.com]

Don't. Want. To. Know.

kthnx.

[joeymew.livejournal.com]

I think if I met you IRL first, I'd like you but I'd be to shy to talk to you. Because I'm incredibly shy IRL.

I dunno why people are so different. Different means of talking, maybe?

[conuly]

How so?

[maladaptive.livejournal.com]

It's the relative anonymity of being online, I think.

People can't hear me stammer online. They're not looking at my face going "why doesn't she wear makeup?" They're not thinking about what you look like, or anything OTHER than what you're saying. It lends weight to the text on the screen that the words coming out of your mouth don't have.

Oh-- and I think we'd be friends as well, conuly. We both like to talk politics, and I'm sure we're both respectful enough to agree to disagree when it happens.

[dandelion.livejournal.com]

I'd be your fwend *grins evilly* Seriously, I would- I don't know exactly why I would, but I would.

[morganne13.livejournal.com]

I think I'd be friendly with you. I'd certainly enjoy talking to you, cause you seem highly intelligent and open minded and not afraid to speak your mind. We might not be close friends cause the general sense I get from your journal is that you and I are way too different in how we respond and think to meet on that kind of wavelength, but I think we would certainly be friendly if not friends to some degree.
IRL is always going to be more complicated cause its physical and harder to get away from. Also, I think that there is more separation of personalities and whatnot here on lj......not completely or anything, but if you don't like something or someone you can just not read. Also, if someone here only kinda likes you or tolerates you or whatever, because its online they might fall into indifferent instead.
As far as the mindless attacking dicotomy, the pen is mightier than the sword and people who might not normally speak up irl where they might be too shy, verbally clumsy, afraid, or whatever have the ability to do so here.

[fjorab-teke.livejournal.com]

I think I'd be friendly with you in real life, although we might bore each other a little bit after a while since we don't have a whole lot of interests in common...but hen again we might introduce each other to more new things, which is one reason I'm sometimes drawn to people who have only one or two things in common with me, so we can share more and learn from each other.

[xiggaroo.livejournal.com]

I don't know why there's a difference. I have ideas, but nothing really conclusive.

I don't know if I'd've been friendly with you IRL at the time i met you online. You know I am fairly shy now, but when we first met, I blushed and panicked if someone looked at me. I'm not as bad anymore (which, really, I thank you mainly for. But that's unrelated.)

I think you're the same person online and off. You're you. But, you do seem to get frustrated more easily IRL. Which, I think applies to everyone.

I'm not really sure what you're asking... I'm tired.

*hugs* I love you to death Con, and that goes for so many people. Isn't that what matters?

[xiggaroo.livejournal.com]

And, can I add that you're the only person I'd want to have a 3 am conversation about declawing cats with. :P

[codeman38.livejournal.com]

::shrug:: Personally, from what I've seen of your journal, I actually think you're rather interesting. In a good way. And you'd probably be the sort with whom I'd be friends in real life as well...

[conuly]

There's a bad way to be interesting?

[xiggaroo.livejournal.com]

Man whips out penis and pisses off the side of the boat.

Interesting? Yes.

[conuly]

Not especially... it happens often enough, anyway.

Besides, it's a great place to make snide comments!

[xiggaroo.livejournal.com]

Don't. Want. To. Know.

kthnx.

[joeymew.livejournal.com]

I think if I met you IRL first, I'd like you but I'd be to shy to talk to you. Because I'm incredibly shy IRL.

I dunno why people are so different. Different means of talking, maybe?

[conuly]

How so?

[maladaptive.livejournal.com]

It's the relative anonymity of being online, I think.

People can't hear me stammer online. They're not looking at my face going "why doesn't she wear makeup?" They're not thinking about what you look like, or anything OTHER than what you're saying. It lends weight to the text on the screen that the words coming out of your mouth don't have.

Oh-- and I think we'd be friends as well, conuly. We both like to talk politics, and I'm sure we're both respectful enough to agree to disagree when it happens.

[dandelion.livejournal.com]

I'd be your fwend *grins evilly* Seriously, I would- I don't know exactly why I would, but I would.

[morganne13.livejournal.com]

I think I'd be friendly with you. I'd certainly enjoy talking to you, cause you seem highly intelligent and open minded and not afraid to speak your mind. We might not be close friends cause the general sense I get from your journal is that you and I are way too different in how we respond and think to meet on that kind of wavelength, but I think we would certainly be friendly if not friends to some degree.
IRL is always going to be more complicated cause its physical and harder to get away from. Also, I think that there is more separation of personalities and whatnot here on lj......not completely or anything, but if you don't like something or someone you can just not read. Also, if someone here only kinda likes you or tolerates you or whatever, because its online they might fall into indifferent instead.
As far as the mindless attacking dicotomy, the pen is mightier than the sword and people who might not normally speak up irl where they might be too shy, verbally clumsy, afraid, or whatever have the ability to do so here.