So, on Ana...

[conuly]

1. That girl has... the absolute worst timing. No sooner do I start to type this up than she wakes up a bit with a nightmare. She fell asleep as soon as I patted her back, though.

2. No, really, that girl has the oddest sense of fear I've ever seen. She is NOT scared of:

Heights
Big dogs (she's quite good with animals, actually, gentle, and she waits for them, she doesn't chase them)
Climbing on things
Jumping down from things twice her height
Dangling in midair
Being all alone
Bugs in the air
Big kids
Going down the big slide alone

She IS scared of:

The wind
Rain
Sprinklers
Being licked by dogs, big or otherwise
Bugs NOT in the air
French
Being cursed at in Walloon (I'm scared of that too, and I'm also scared that the words slipped out of my mouth so easily when I wanted her to COME HERE NOW.)

Very odd, our Ana.

So, today she wanted to swing all by herself, on the big kid swing (they have a real dearth of those at this playground, it's very annoying), and she got the whole idea of pumping - kick, no kick, kick, no kick. But she didn't really have the mass to get a good momentum up, and if she slowed down even slightly (she was fine if I started her, pretty much), she'd start kicking too fast, and then it'd all fall apart.

Still, not bad, eh?

I need to go on the swings myself. Maybe this week my mom can meet me at the park a bit earlier Friday, and watch Ana in the playground while I go swing. I like the swings.

And, like I've said, she's getting smarter by the day. Today, she's sitting in 'dul's apartment, going "Daddy? Daddy?". When I say "Daddy's not here", the response is "Mommy?" (She's not here, sweetie.) Then, as a joke, I go "Ana?" Prompt "giggle, giggle, no, no Ana. Ana in house. Ana house" (She meant that Ana was really in her toy house, not sitting in front of me.)

And yesterday, we were playing with her little bear. First, it's "Talk bear? You talk bear" to get me to play the bear's part, then she's pointing at everything, telling the bear what it is. "Is car. Is book. Is Connie-milk!" Yes, I do not have breasts, I have Conniemilk. "Is Ana-milk!" (She doesn't have breasts at all, but she has the concept down.) Of course, when I point at the bear's chest and go "Bearmilk!", that's more giggles: "BEAR milk? Bear milk! Giggle! Giggle!"

Comments

[davidkevin.livejournal.com]

You are aware that the "[blank]-milk" usage will at some point in the future inevitably occur at the most amusingly socially inappropriate time?

[conuly]

When would it be socially inappropriate for her to acknowledge that this is where milk comes from?

[brownkitty.livejournal.com]

In a restaurant, perhaps, when asked if she wants milk with her dinner.

"Waitressmilk?"

[moggymania.livejournal.com]

With an adult that doesn't care to have xyr breasts pointed out, or assumptions made about what xe plans to do with them? :)

[conuly]

The kid's two. She'll quit it before she's three and coherant enough that people will get upset.

I'm beginning to realize that, short of screaming, making messes, and otherwise being obnoxious, kids can get away with anything. Saying things adults can't say is one of them.

Adults can't be surprised that people have breasts, but toddlers can.

[conuly]

Oh, that'd be funny. Not because she'd say it, but because she'd smack her lips and, if close enough, pretend to nurse.

It's one of her games. Right now she prefers grabbing us and trying to make us go to sleep, though.

[moggymania.livejournal.com]

Are you sure that they're genuine fears and not sensory issues? (I ask because that list is pretty strikingly similar to the ones posted by parents of young AC kids -- and I noticed that most of the things in the "fear" list are auditory/tactile oriented, while most of the "non-fear" list is not.)

[moggymania.livejournal.com]

Well, it depends... With most people these days, kids can get away with anything -- but I know a lot of adults that don't share that age-related feeling, which is what I mean. (There are also many adults that don't share the feeling, but also won't speak up, in order to avoid causing a fight. They then go complain somewhere else, with people that will understand. You know that, though, some of them -- not all of them -- are in the childfree community, which is why it has such a strong reputation.)

[conuly]

Well, she is also scared of loud noises... you could be on to something there.

(Either way, she's (otherwise) very NT. And right-handed. Can you just hear the disappointment over that last one?)

[conuly]

Mmm. My feeling here is that if it's okay for Ana to point and say "Connie-fork" and "Mommy-foot" and "ANA BOOBOO!" like that, "So-and-so milk" isn't any worse. Forget childfreeness, or even children, I don't see that the breasts are something that can't be mentioned ever.

She's not saying milk because milk comes from there, except in a roundabout way. She's saying it because when she nurses, her mom says "you want milk?", and she figures the name of the thing is "milk". And she wants it, or doesn't. She knows by now that only Mommy actually has milk for her.

So, to sum up the rambling: I don't think it's bad to point out any part of the body (though as she gets old enough to understand that reasoning, I assume she'll have that explained to her), and I know she's not saying "milk comes from there" (though if she were, that'd be pretty cute, especially if she did that to her dad).

And people who get offended over what an obviously-just-a-toddler says... well, that is their problem. Ana says please, and thank you, and sorry, and excuse me, and no thank you, and she picks up trash in the park (her own all the time, and other people's if we'd let her, but it's all dirty and she is inclined to put her hands in her mouth, so no), and I'm not going to tell her to stop discussing her body because of... well, people who get upset over what toddlers say.

Besides, brilliant as she is, I'm not sure she'd understand. The kid also spent today pulling up her skirt and flashing everybody. No body shame there.

[conuly]

Mind, if Ana is screaming, or kicking, or doing something otherwise offensive, that's just not acceptable. And we tell her so. In my case, we use exactly those words: That is NOT acceptable, Ana. And then it either stops, or she goes where she can calm down. Or once on the bus I held her feet down, because I was damned if I was going to walk a half a mile with an angry toddler, but I didn't want her kicking everyone in front of us either.

[adina77.livejournal.com]

Dul told me she is afraid of snow. there is another thing to add to your list

[davidkevin.livejournal.com]

I'm joking, dear.

She'll do it during your combined Key to the City ceremony with Dolly Parton and Pamela Anderson, in front of Mayor Bloomberg, Governor Pataki, and the combined reporting staffs of the Post, Times, Daily News, and Newsday. How's that?

[davidkevin.livejournal.com]

You are aware that the "[blank]-milk" usage will at some point in the future inevitably occur at the most amusingly socially inappropriate time?

[conuly]

When would it be socially inappropriate for her to acknowledge that this is where milk comes from?

[brownkitty.livejournal.com]

In a restaurant, perhaps, when asked if she wants milk with her dinner.

"Waitressmilk?"

[moggymania.livejournal.com]

With an adult that doesn't care to have xyr breasts pointed out, or assumptions made about what xe plans to do with them? :)

[conuly]

The kid's two. She'll quit it before she's three and coherant enough that people will get upset.

I'm beginning to realize that, short of screaming, making messes, and otherwise being obnoxious, kids can get away with anything. Saying things adults can't say is one of them.

Adults can't be surprised that people have breasts, but toddlers can.

[conuly]

Oh, that'd be funny. Not because she'd say it, but because she'd smack her lips and, if close enough, pretend to nurse.

It's one of her games. Right now she prefers grabbing us and trying to make us go to sleep, though.

[moggymania.livejournal.com]

Are you sure that they're genuine fears and not sensory issues? (I ask because that list is pretty strikingly similar to the ones posted by parents of young AC kids -- and I noticed that most of the things in the "fear" list are auditory/tactile oriented, while most of the "non-fear" list is not.)

[moggymania.livejournal.com]

Well, it depends... With most people these days, kids can get away with anything -- but I know a lot of adults that don't share that age-related feeling, which is what I mean. (There are also many adults that don't share the feeling, but also won't speak up, in order to avoid causing a fight. They then go complain somewhere else, with people that will understand. You know that, though, some of them -- not all of them -- are in the childfree community, which is why it has such a strong reputation.)

[conuly]

Well, she is also scared of loud noises... you could be on to something there.

(Either way, she's (otherwise) very NT. And right-handed. Can you just hear the disappointment over that last one?)

[conuly]

Mmm. My feeling here is that if it's okay for Ana to point and say "Connie-fork" and "Mommy-foot" and "ANA BOOBOO!" like that, "So-and-so milk" isn't any worse. Forget childfreeness, or even children, I don't see that the breasts are something that can't be mentioned ever.

She's not saying milk because milk comes from there, except in a roundabout way. She's saying it because when she nurses, her mom says "you want milk?", and she figures the name of the thing is "milk". And she wants it, or doesn't. She knows by now that only Mommy actually has milk for her.

So, to sum up the rambling: I don't think it's bad to point out any part of the body (though as she gets old enough to understand that reasoning, I assume she'll have that explained to her), and I know she's not saying "milk comes from there" (though if she were, that'd be pretty cute, especially if she did that to her dad).

And people who get offended over what an obviously-just-a-toddler says... well, that is their problem. Ana says please, and thank you, and sorry, and excuse me, and no thank you, and she picks up trash in the park (her own all the time, and other people's if we'd let her, but it's all dirty and she is inclined to put her hands in her mouth, so no), and I'm not going to tell her to stop discussing her body because of... well, people who get upset over what toddlers say.

Besides, brilliant as she is, I'm not sure she'd understand. The kid also spent today pulling up her skirt and flashing everybody. No body shame there.

[conuly]

Mind, if Ana is screaming, or kicking, or doing something otherwise offensive, that's just not acceptable. And we tell her so. In my case, we use exactly those words: That is NOT acceptable, Ana. And then it either stops, or she goes where she can calm down. Or once on the bus I held her feet down, because I was damned if I was going to walk a half a mile with an angry toddler, but I didn't want her kicking everyone in front of us either.

[adina77.livejournal.com]

Dul told me she is afraid of snow. there is another thing to add to your list

[davidkevin.livejournal.com]

I'm joking, dear.

She'll do it during your combined Key to the City ceremony with Dolly Parton and Pamela Anderson, in front of Mayor Bloomberg, Governor Pataki, and the combined reporting staffs of the Post, Times, Daily News, and Newsday. How's that?