As soon as possible, I need to learn how to roll across car hoods like in the movies

[conuly]

That is all.

or maybe everybody else can learn to park all the way in their driveway and to stop behind the crosswalk, that is also a possibility

Comments

[kengr]

Many years back I was crossing the street behind a bunch of teenagers. Some idjit had stopped his car even with the *far side of the crosswalk instead of the near side.

The teens just hopped up and walked across his hood. This elicited much cursing from him.

I just commented as I walked around the front of his car "What do you expect when you are blocking the crosswalk?"

[archangelbeth]

*evil snicker*

[conuly]

Go teens go!

Seriously, what do these drivers even think, that those few feet are going to get them there so much faster? They won't.

[silveradept]

The hood slide is a strongly advanced technique, mostly because most people don't wax their hood enough to allow for a full-tilt movie-quality slide. You may need to carry some Sex Wax or its automotive equivalent to apply first.

[conuly]

Hm. Hilarious as the image of me waxing their cars before rolling is....

Okay ...

[ysabetwordsmith]

This is a slide, not a tumble:

https://nerdist.com/learn-how-to-slide-across-the-hood-of-your-car-like-a-professional/

What I have seen work for rolling is very similar to any other front or angular roll, you are just rolling onto a surface higher than the floor. Put your hand or forearm on the car, tilt over it, and push off from the ground.

http://wildernessarena.com/skills/combat-and-self-defense/how-to-break-your-fall-in-combat-situations

Even if you're joking about learning this, it is a very good concept to have in mind should a car be about to hit you. Trying to roll, however imperfect, is usually better than letting it hit you square on. A roll will work in situations where it is not possible to dodge completely.

Bouncing off cars

[gingicat]

In 1997, on Erev Yom Kippur of all times, I was hit by a car while crossing the street at dusk. (The car had no headlights on, but it was a good half a block away and I did see it. And I sprinted across the intersection, and I have red hair and was wearing a pale olive-ish green dress.)

One of the witnesses said I bounced off of the hood, clear evidence that the guy was speeding. Thankfully I was uninjured other than scraped skin, yay for being 27 and healthy at the time.

Re: Okay ...

[conuly]

*scribblescribblescribble*

Thanks.

Re: Okay ...

[ysabetwordsmith]

If this is a kind of skill you want to acquire, the best approach is to look for a place to practice it. A fitness center with a good mat room, a crossfit or parkour gym, and a general self-defense dojo are all good possibilities. You need a floor with good mats at first, and then you need matted or foam obstacles. Last, hard obstacles. Happily, these resources are becoming much more common than they used to be.

Most teachers recommend learning a front fall first, then side, then back, then fancier things like rolls. These are all things you can use if you ever slip on ice or mud. If you know how to fall, it lowers your chance of injury.

[wpadmirer]

I have always wanted to do that butt-slide thing just once. But I figure I'd end up face-planting on the sidewalk on the other side.

[conuly]

That's why you gotta learn first.

[peristaltor]

We used to do that in the '70s just for laughs. We only did it on our own cars, which had hoods thick enough to hold our weight without denting, of course.

There's a friend's school movie project somewhere where Dave hit me with his car like 10 times (for different angles). The neighbors were telling his folks for weeks about a hit and run in front of their house.

Today's hoods? Thin. Even a slightly built person would dent them.

[conuly]

Today's hoods? Thin. Even a slightly built person would dent them.

Shockingly, I don't care that much.

[peristaltor]

I meant for practice purposes. ;-)

[adafrog]

Although the car hood roll is pretty cool.

[cellio]

I have this occasional fantasy of opening the back door, getting in and sliding across, and exiting via the other side door. (I mean in those bigger SUVs and stuff, not the tiny cars.) In my fantasy I don't bother to close the doors and the red light lasts long enough that the driver can't go anywhere.

Fortunately, rational-brain knows how profoundly dangerous this would be. But a pedestrian can dream!

(Another occasional fantasy involves paint pellets and the means to fire them at cars that try to run me down in crosswalks.)