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Whispering.
Somebody elsewhere (gee, that's descriptive) was the subject of whispering in a store the other day, for carrying her baby.
Whispering about people... there's something I like to think went out in high school. But I guess it didn't, huh?
There are two kinds of whisperers. The first kind is genuinely ignorant of the fact that they're being rude. The second kind knows full well - they want you to hear them. They're trying to shame you into conforming, but they don't have the moral fortitude to talk to you outright.
Now, that's low. And it's childish. But I'm going to share with all of youse what I shared with her there - the trick that works on both groups.
Here you are. You're standing around, minding your own business, when you hear whispering about how you're dressed, or how you did (or didn't do) your hair, or how you are such a suck-up in class, or whatever. What they want you to do, if they think about it, is blush and keep your mouth shut and avoid them.
So you have to do the opposite. Turn around, and say, nice and loud (and smiling if you have to force it out) "Hi! Are you talking about me here?" or, if you're feeling magnanimous (or extra evil, depending on how you feel about this) "Hi! Are you talking about me? I'd be glad to answer any questions you have about my looks/morals/faith/orientation/whatever not-your-business topic that comes to mind"
At this point, most people will pretend they were not, in fact, channeling their inner ten year old and gossping about you where you could hear them. (And how rude is that? Seriously.) In that case, you can smile and push the issue a bit more. "Are you sure? I can give you a link to some information on whatever-it-is" or "Good. Because that's really childish, and none of your business anyway. My name's so-and-so, glad to meet you!"
Occasionally, you get a hard case who really will try to engage you in an argument. Sorry about that - but at this point you pick a method and stick with it. Either you go with "That's really none of your business, I don't ask you about your blank" or you calmly point out every place they don't know what the heck they're talking about. Key word is calm.
And sometimes you get somebody who really is interested, and if you don't mind teaching them something, you can do that. If you do mind, and that's your business, you can point out that it's not their problem or concern.
You have to be willing to confront them on their rude behaviour to start - but since they aren't expecting it, most people are generally nonplussed when you do this. Promise.
I'll write some haiku later, get back to date.
Whispering about people... there's something I like to think went out in high school. But I guess it didn't, huh?
There are two kinds of whisperers. The first kind is genuinely ignorant of the fact that they're being rude. The second kind knows full well - they want you to hear them. They're trying to shame you into conforming, but they don't have the moral fortitude to talk to you outright.
Now, that's low. And it's childish. But I'm going to share with all of youse what I shared with her there - the trick that works on both groups.
Here you are. You're standing around, minding your own business, when you hear whispering about how you're dressed, or how you did (or didn't do) your hair, or how you are such a suck-up in class, or whatever. What they want you to do, if they think about it, is blush and keep your mouth shut and avoid them.
So you have to do the opposite. Turn around, and say, nice and loud (and smiling if you have to force it out) "Hi! Are you talking about me here?" or, if you're feeling magnanimous (or extra evil, depending on how you feel about this) "Hi! Are you talking about me? I'd be glad to answer any questions you have about my looks/morals/faith/orientation/whatever not-your-business topic that comes to mind"
At this point, most people will pretend they were not, in fact, channeling their inner ten year old and gossping about you where you could hear them. (And how rude is that? Seriously.) In that case, you can smile and push the issue a bit more. "Are you sure? I can give you a link to some information on whatever-it-is" or "Good. Because that's really childish, and none of your business anyway. My name's so-and-so, glad to meet you!"
Occasionally, you get a hard case who really will try to engage you in an argument. Sorry about that - but at this point you pick a method and stick with it. Either you go with "That's really none of your business, I don't ask you about your blank" or you calmly point out every place they don't know what the heck they're talking about. Key word is calm.
And sometimes you get somebody who really is interested, and if you don't mind teaching them something, you can do that. If you do mind, and that's your business, you can point out that it's not their problem or concern.
You have to be willing to confront them on their rude behaviour to start - but since they aren't expecting it, most people are generally nonplussed when you do this. Promise.
I'll write some haiku later, get back to date.
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