How do I get Evangeline to slow down?

[conuly]

We've been having the nieces do "extra math" because NYC schools put a big emphasis on reading and I think math really suffers a little. Especially when the kids are already reading at or above grade level.

We didn't finish their workbooks during the school year, we're doing that now, and starting up with math games and all again because if nothing else, this summer Ana has got to, got to, GOT TO start memorizing some of her addition and subtraction facts. She has to count on her fingers, and then she gets frustrated that it slows her down and she drops her pencil.

If Ana works at the pace she's going, one exercise a day (which is more than she would be doing during the school year, there are more days than assignments), she'll pretty much be done by the time school starts in September. One workbook is half a year, we started late in the second half of the year, that's about right.

If Evangeline works at the pace she's going, 3+ pages a day, she'll be done with first grade math by the time she enters first grade.

She is ahead of where her sister was at that age, at that point in school (remember, Ana entered kindy half a year older than her sister entered did!), heck - she's ahead of where Ana was in the middle of her first grade year already!

I have tried talking to her, imploring her to slow down. "No thanks!" I've tried taking away her math and giving her on-level books to read to me. I've tried hiding her math, which is just deeply surreal.

I love this child. I don't understand her. HELP ME.

(Also, I love Ana, but she has got to stop with the fingers. I know the school didn't emphasize memorizing, and I know they have a really valid reason for that, but I also know that Ana is getting really really convinced that because she can't do math fast she's not good at it, and that's not the case. But you can't convince that child of anything. Best thing for her is lots of very cleverly disguised drill. Next year is not going to be very fun.)

Comments

[siderea]

I mean, there's not really a solution for that

Sure there is. Several. Placement in a higher level class, whether a grade higher or in a GT/honors track. Being assigned more challenging work in class than the other students. Homeschooling, full or partial.

The problem isn't that the child has a talent and taste for math. The problem is keeping her in a classroom beneath her developmental level, and expecting her, at her age, to have a level of behavioral management that many adults wouldn't in analogous circumstances.

[dragonwolf]

Keep in mind, though, that not all school districts (even city ones, though I'm admittedly not familiar with theirs in particular) have honors tracks. For that matter, in a lot of places "honors" just means "more work," and not so much "more challenging work."

In my experience, too, advancing a grade level makes fellow classmates in the new grade level resentful, which makes school life hell on earth. =/

But yeah, being forced to slow down to beneath one's own ability isn't fun, either.

[siderea]

Not to discount your experience, but it's not the only experience. There are better and worse ways to do it, and there are kids who are more likely to be able to handle it than others, and there are teachers who are more and less likely to be able to handle it.

Life generally doesn't come with guarantees. It comes with opportunities, which it's up to us to make the most of.

[dragonwolf]

Not to discount your experience, but it's not the only experience.

I'm not sure why you think I felt it is. Nor does it make it any less valid, or not something to consider. In my experience, kids don't like it when someone younger than them does better in school. How it's handled certainly does come into play, but knowing how bullying is handled across the board in general, I don't hold much stock in how the teachers handle it, particularly in public schools. That leaves a lot more to be handled by the child than many people think. In this case, whether Connie's nieces can handle it is up to Connie and the girls' parents, and it's my opinion that it should be decided with the above in mind.