Well, no, of course there's no way of knowing from the text.

I'm just saying that this reads to me very much like something someone with AS wrote for general consumption, and I'd bet a considerable amount that if the assignment (whether he came up with it himself or someone gave it to him) was "things I have done as someone with AS to get along with my NT wife" then there was no way that "things my NT wife has done to get along with me as someone with AS" even entered the list of things he might want to include.

He does, of course, mention her sitting down and saying "Can we talk?" in a non-threatening way, which is something I'm sure she had to learn to do.