Well, that was surreal.
Mar. 5th, 2013 04:13 pmI don't think I've ever been 100% in the right before.
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Apparently, it is wrong to tell people you were offended, it is wrong to explain why somebody else might be offended, it is wrong to know more about holidays or (to judge from the deleted comment) DST than the moderator or share information that might be useful or interesting on... wild leap here, probably ANY subject, it's wrong to reply calmly to other people as they get more and more hysterical, it is wrong (deleted comment again) not to snark back at somebody who just attacked you, and it's wrong to have trouble reading the aforementioned hysterical comments. I will concede to misreading one of the first comments I replied to, but it really is hard to find the words through a smokescreen of redundant question marks and exclamation points. Honestly, I wouldn't let Eva put that many in a paragraph! Refusing to throw a tantrum is way more trollish than yelling and screaming, I guess. And in this bizarro world, keeping your cool and trying to explain your position is both more offensive and more signaling that you "enjoy" being offended than throwing a screaming hissy fit and insulting anybody who disagrees with you. Plus, it's wrong.
It's probably also wrong to rejoin a comm after being removed, but at least that taught her the difference between remove and ban : )
It's a pity, because despite the fact that half the comm refuses to use lj cuts it's actually a fun resource. Gone, forevermore, because some people would rather wallow in their own ignorance. (I never used that phrasing, but now I think I ought to have. I always love a chance to accuse people of wallowing in their own ignorance. I love the image it brings up. And if you can get banned for saying things like "Halloween wasn't widespread until relatively recently" you might as well have more fun first.)
Is it wrong to see if anything interesting is happening on the DW mirror? I wouldn't join in if it is, just... read.
http://vintage-ads.livejournal.com/4187
Apparently, it is wrong to tell people you were offended, it is wrong to explain why somebody else might be offended, it is wrong to know more about holidays or (to judge from the deleted comment) DST than the moderator or share information that might be useful or interesting on... wild leap here, probably ANY subject, it's wrong to reply calmly to other people as they get more and more hysterical, it is wrong (deleted comment again) not to snark back at somebody who just attacked you, and it's wrong to have trouble reading the aforementioned hysterical comments. I will concede to misreading one of the first comments I replied to, but it really is hard to find the words through a smokescreen of redundant question marks and exclamation points. Honestly, I wouldn't let Eva put that many in a paragraph! Refusing to throw a tantrum is way more trollish than yelling and screaming, I guess. And in this bizarro world, keeping your cool and trying to explain your position is both more offensive and more signaling that you "enjoy" being offended than throwing a screaming hissy fit and insulting anybody who disagrees with you. Plus, it's wrong.
It's probably also wrong to rejoin a comm after being removed, but at least that taught her the difference between remove and ban : )
It's a pity, because despite the fact that half the comm refuses to use lj cuts it's actually a fun resource. Gone, forevermore, because some people would rather wallow in their own ignorance. (I never used that phrasing, but now I think I ought to have. I always love a chance to accuse people of wallowing in their own ignorance. I love the image it brings up. And if you can get banned for saying things like "Halloween wasn't widespread until relatively recently" you might as well have more fun first.)
Is it wrong to see if anything interesting is happening on the DW mirror? I wouldn't join in if it is, just... read.
no subject
Date: 2013-03-12 01:35 am (UTC)As someone who faces that exact trigger, that situation is extraordinarily frustrating, anxiety-inducing, and downright terrifying as you question your sanity, and if you aren't at the point that you can recognize that it's happening, while it's happening, you end up making things worse in a sincere and concerted effort to make things better.
And to be fair, she asked multiple times for an explaination of exactly what it was that made it offensive other than that it was a Native American man wearing a headdress. It also wasn't until you joined in that she really started escalating and went off the deep end (which is why I think part of her trigger is the feeling of being outnumbered and essentially trapped).
I'm actually kind of surprised that you, of all people, didn't recognize the chain of events as a Theory of Mind breakdown. Both you and bas have a rather "I shouldn't have to tell you, it should be obvious" tone to your posts and never actually explain what it is that makes it so offensive - particularly when viewed in light of the actual facts, and not the distorted versions that resulted from twisting misstia's words around like a pretzel. How did you manage to construe "as far as I know, that is an actual Native American..." as "it is not offensive to post stereotypical pictures of Native Americans (or Indians) so long as the person in the picture is really just pretending"?
That by no means excuses her escalation (and I genuinely think she should get help for that, for her own sake), but I believe it does explain it and help to understand why she reacted the way she did.
On a side note, it seems the abuse of punctuation and capitalization is the way she normally writes. If her comments there made your eyes bleed, don't look at her journal.
And finally, for a potentially stupid question - how is a non-Native American being offended by a picture of a Native American in a headdress any different than a neurotypical being offended by the use of the term "autistic"?